TYPE [89]

Clueless

2012-01-02T13:42:00.000+08:00

Since I came back from Selective/Elective, I was in Family Med posting for 4 weeks followed by 2 weeks of Ortho and 2 weeks of Psych. Ortho was fun! Previously, I disliked everything about it because I could not understand the concept behind it and the scope of learning was so wide that I had no idea what to focus on because in EOS 7 back then, anything could come out. Anyway, that was the past. In short, exams were horribly tough. With only 10 minutes per SAQ question, I pretty much stared at my paper. Only Ortho SAQ paper was do-able because what we learned actually came out unlike the other postings, questions asked were cases we hardly see in the clinic.

Just entering Dermatology posting. It's a two week posting and 1 week has passed. I haven't gotten the hang of it yet. As usual, I don't get many things. I mean, yeah, it takes experience to tell what the person has but it's all so SIMILAR. =.= And, really, it does get me frustrated when everyone goes like, "Yeah, it's scaly, there are plaques.. It's *fill in the blanks*" And I don't see scales. Maybe because the scales I had in mind were like animal scales but I'm just trying really hard but still, I don't see it. Maybe I'm too far away from the lesion or I just need a magnifying glass. Then, differentials would come out - psoriasis, seborrheic dermatitis, atopic eczema etc etc. Then, I get all stressed out.

Just the other day, my group came across one condition called keratosis pilaris. It's a common condition but the name itself gives me that awkward feeling like how I'm learning a whole new set of language in Dermato.

Oh, in 5 weeks time, there's an ACLS theory and practical to sit for. We are on our own. Minor postings, to me is packed and somehow, I've got to fit time to memorize the algorithms like how seniors did. It's just the 1st out of the 8 weeks in minor postings and I'm already stressed. =.= I hope ENT, Ophthalmo and A&E wouldn't be too bad.

#71

2011-10-19T13:17:00.000+08:00

Dr: Which year are you in?
Me: 4th year
Dr: Do you know how to take a Dextrostix?
Me: Yeah, I think so. *puzzled*
Dr: Don't be so confident ah you.
Me: *wtf*

Had I said just yes, wouldn't that just be overconfident? And I ended up seeing him poking the patient twice just to take blood for a random blood glucose reading.

I am not enjoying my attachment. Seriously.

#70

2011-09-08T20:15:00.000+08:00

I'm going to be attending the dance class in a couple of hours. I haven't registered yet but I decided to go there about 3 weeks ago. I'm nervous in many ways and scared. Yet, excited and I guess, this is what they call mixed feelings.

For one, I haven't gone for dance classes in years. Furthermore, I've only been to ballet and latin dance classes, not street jazz, not hip hop. Lastly, it's been 1 1/2 years since I actually danced. So, yeah, I'm nervous and I wish I could have told someone about it to lose all these feelings.

I'm worried and paranoid. What if the class isn't today? What if I've got the timing wrong? What if what I'm wearing isn't appropriate? What if I just don't blend in? I do have all those details but just, what if it wasn't what I expected? :S What if I don't get it right or can't catch up? What if I don't get along with the other people?

Of course, it would have been great if I've got a friend to join me in the classes but no, there isn't one. So, tonight, I'm on my own. Strategy: if you're an introvert, you won't be noticed except by the teacher. Oh wait, everyone notices the new kid. pfft. >.<

#69

2011-09-07T19:06:00.000+08:00

During this holidays, I've spent quite a bit =/ or rather a lot... on shoes, clothes and artstuff. I'll probably have the chance to always make use of the shoes but the clothes, I'm not sure. Well, they are casual and they were nice but definitely not to be worn to the hospital. And if it's going to be casual wear, then it would most likely stay in the closet for quite a while.

As I was just thinking back, I thought about how I used to dislike my friends in high school. Now, I think I'm beginning to become one of them. It is inevitable. But, it can be changed. Everyone has their own strong quatlities, some people don't mind it, others hate it. Some deem it bad, some think it's good. But at the end of the day, it's how you look at it and no one is right or wrong (of course unless it's a crime whereby lives are involved and someone got hurt real badly). Otherwise, it's just another learning experience, not to be made again.

At times, I feel lost, not knowing what to do with so much free time. I know I'm supposed to use it to the fullest, waste no time, spend it with family and all but really, I don't think I know how. Before it was always studying and squeezing some extra time with some friends to watch a couple of series. Then, back to studying again. Now, it's more like sleeping and thinking about what to do next. Well, unlike my other friends who chose to do an attachment in the hospital or have plans with family like travelling overseas, visiting relatives, weddings etc, I'm pretty much at home and generally, I don't like the emptiness felt.

Everything that's fun require some amount of cash. Visiting places, going on a food outing, travelling, watching movies, some activity like ice-skating/bowling, going to theme parks etc. So, all I can do is watch AFC (Asian Food Channel) and read novels borrowed from my sis-in-law to pass time. By the way, taking care after a baby is not easy and I don't enjoy it. >.<

Just for a day

2011-09-07T11:00:00.000+08:00

Have you thought about what you could be doing with the time if you were not on your computer/laptop?

Some people would actually have better things to do and with other people who are more important in their lives. Some people would be at a lost because most of the time, they are in front of their laptops.

For me, I fall in the second category but just a random thought and challenge. What if you don't turn on your laptop for just a day? Then, you wouldn't be charging the laptop all day (say you don't let it run on battery). And, if a group of us did it, then, it would in a way conserve resources for one day! Would it make a difference? Hmm, that I don't know but there should be an effect for every thing done, right?

Think about everyone not going to check their emails, tweet, facebook or blog for a day. Don't you think that's cool? I think it is :) heh..

#68

2011-09-06T15:30:00.000+08:00

You can't take back what you've said.
You can't undo what you've did.

But, you can change what you can say and do.
You can choose what to say and do.

#67

2011-09-06T14:54:00.000+08:00

Reminiscing - To recollect and tell of past experiences.

That's what I've been doing. Thinking about the past while moving forward to another day of holiday. I'm starting feel a bit bored at home but it is something that I won't complain because it's better to have holidays than none. But still, I'm not doing anything productive at home.

#66

2011-09-05T19:10:00.000+08:00

The last thing I needed was another hurdle to jump over. Someone thought I made a mistake, I didn't think so. I tried to fix it. Things got worse. I tried fixing it again. It doesn't feel like things are getting better. I should have just left it I guess but I didn't.

This reminds me of the malay proverb 'bagai tikus membaiki labu' which brings about the meaning whereby the mouse tries to fixed the pumpkin with holes by biting it away but the holes got bigger. For some reason, I'd end up in situations like this.

The more I think about it, the more I relate it to my upbringing. I guess it was different and it wouldn't be the first time since people questioned me regarding my understanding.

#65

2011-09-05T18:33:00.000+08:00

Waiting is not easy.

especially when it's a reply via text, email, or a phonecall.

*sigh*

#64

2011-09-05T13:15:00.000+08:00

No one sees things the way I do. No one would accept the way I figure things out. No one would ever understand.

We just have different upbringing.

#63

2011-09-02T23:44:00.003+08:00

Some things need to be changed.

#62

2011-08-25T03:21:00.000+08:00

I found a dance school for my non-medical attachment. Looks like I'm going to pick up Street Jazz and Hip Hop. I've never gone for dance classes for those styles. So, it's going to be a new experience for me and I'm looking forward to it. I'm starting in September, which means I still have some free time on my hands.

Lately, I've been working on some origami of making little books with 8 pages in it. More about this later. I'm also looking forward to catching up with some of my friends. :) 1 week of holidays has passed and I have managed to wrap a book, fold swans for fun and take care of my neice. I think starting from tomorrow onwards (or rather today), things are going to be different. I sense that there'll be a change in the things I do and I have a good feeling about it.

It feels good to let go of certain things, of the past and bitterness. It feels nice to have finally made peace. The path you want to walk depends on how you want it to be. That's the message I think the universe tried to convey to me.

#61

2011-08-22T00:58:00.002+08:00

The Hand That Will Save Lives

This is not about learning surgical instruments. It's a picture I intended to take but probably would have been better at a different angle. But, the time and place did not permit me to do so. I like this picture still, if you see it the way I do. :)

#60

2011-08-20T00:48:00.000+08:00

The Choice Is In Your Hands

Let the holidays begin...

2011-08-17T17:55:00.000+08:00

So, after the many weeks of posting after posting to weeks of studying to days of exams to this morning, we had a pretty comforting news that there were no candidates for borderline OSCE. It was 4 hours of waiting with no source of entertainment but anxiously seeing who comes through the doors and what news they brought. Yes, I made it through another hurdle despite whatever my grades would be. :) And, that is all that matters.

Family and friends have been telling me that grades don't matter once you've graduated as long as you pass.

I'm going to have 2 1/2 months of holidays of which one month consist of a non-medical attachment and one month of medical attachment. Well, usually, both would end up like holidays to me. :) I'll probably be posting more about the silly things that happened during exams. My list of things to do will not vary drastically. It includes:

a) trying a new cake or cupcake recipe
b) dancing
c) learning new songs on the piano
d) photography
e) catching movies
f) shopping and spending time with my family
g) read novels while listening to songs
h) cards, handmade stuff
i) taking care of my neice :)
j) try new food at new places

Well, that's all for now.

#59

2011-08-07T00:45:00.000+08:00

In less than 48 hours, I'm going to take one of the most important exams ever, EOS 7. Am I prepared? Not exactly. I suppose that is the feeling that most of us get. We can never finish studying. We can't predict what questions would be asked.

We can pass if we know what we know. Probably, it's easy to pass but not that easy to get a distinction. I'm not aiming that high because I don't think I'm filled with adequate knowledge to get me there. But, I am aiming that high so that I would land a good pass, not a borderline one. Why so? Because borderline pass students would be required to go for Viva and that worries me.

In some ways, I think about it optimistically like how there's only 15 questions in SAQ and 12 OSPE questions. 7 postings to study and yeah, anything can be asked. Internal medicine, surgery, family medicine, psychiatry, obstetrics, orthopedics and pediatrics. I can't fit everything. So, pray for me... pray for my friends that everyone would pass. :)

As for OSCE, there's 8 short stations and 8 long stations. The marks are stand alone, so it is a MUST to pass OSCE. On the bright side, it's only SAQ on Monday and OSPE on Wednesday. OSCEs are on the following Monday and Tuesday. We'd know our results on Wednesday. If I pass, I get to go home. :) There is no resit for exams like this. So, we either pass or we don't and no one would want to be left behind.

A lecturer of mine said something that was somewhat inspiring. We've already got 40% (assuming every EOP, MCQ, case write-ups were As), then we'd only have another 10% to collect out of the 60%. But, reality is that I'd probably have 20% and have got another 30% to collect. It seems possible because it's all figures. Aaah... exams are inevitable. Somehow that day would eventually come and it's tomorrow.

I miss home :( I want to go back after exams with a smile so that I'd enjoy the 2 months of 'break' there'd be.

#58

2011-06-25T11:12:00.000+08:00

Some people can really get on my nerves multiple times in a day. And all I can do is be patient because regret is something I don't want to feel when I say the wrong things at the wrong time. If I deliberately get back at them, it would make me one of them but what can be done when it's the final straw? Do you just let it go as always? The advice 'Don't care about them' is easier said than done when the person giving the advice is in the shoes of the person being adviced.

#57

2011-06-19T01:36:00.000+08:00

Just yesterday, I was thinking about why I need to come up with learning issues and find sources to write about it. Who knew we would have to do this someday when we were in clinical school? I had no idea. :S

I mean, when in Phase 1, we had to come up with at least 8 learning issues. The fewer the issues, the happier we were because that meant less work and that the session would end faster but thinking about it now, when we had a lot of time, it should have been used properly so that those sessions would end up sticking in our heads until Phase 2. If you ask me, I have not a clue about what I learnt. I might have a bit of basics but when it comes to molecular level, there is no way would I be able to recall lectures on differences between acute and chronic inflammation or perhaps the processes of cell formation and antibodies, process of inflammation etc.

Now, I find it taxing, but only to a certain extent because there are marks for it and there are lecturers who have a certain amount of expectations. I do not like writing learning issues because I am unable to find answers from journals to the question I have posed as an issue. It is not as simple as picking something off the internet like a newspaper article or from a forum discussion. Another reason is because of the time constraint and the amount of ideas that should be generated. Sure, we have 5 weeks to come up with 9 learning issues. 2 learning issues for 4 summaries and 1 for report. But what actually happens during a 5 week posting?

Week 1: Familiarising to a new posting. New schedule. New environment. New style of clerking. New techniques to learn. Basically, everything is NEW!

Week 2: Getting started. Well this should have been done in week 1 actually but it almost never happen unless the mind can be trained in a way to learn and cramp everything in advanced. So we start clerking in pairs. We make mistakes almost all the time. There would always be a piece of missing information.

Week 3: Getting the hang of it. So, this is the time when I would start looking for cases to write on and usually not very successful. This is also the time when I realise that it is rather difficult to look for suitable learning issues. This is the week where I learn to make issues out of things. :)

Week 4: Getting somewhere. This is the week when we are familiarised with the curriculum. I know I am heading somewhere. I know now what this posting is about. But, oh snap, exam is in week 5! This is the week when case summaries and reports should be finished but still, it doesn't happen. Mugging starts here.

Week 5: Exam time. Case summaries/report deadline. Stress.

This cycle repeated itself 3 times during this semester and I am about to go through it the 4th time. Lucky for me, some postings allow us to hand in our assignments on the Monday of a new posting and that would be tomorrow. I still have one more learning issue and one case formulation to complete. *Sigh*

#56

2011-06-17T10:22:00.000+08:00

This is an experience I thought of sharing. The reason why I am writing about this is because I believe that obsessive compulsive personality discorder is not a laughing matter when it could be for some. OCPD is different from OCD (Obsessive compulsive disorder) in many ways yet similar in some. In OCD, the patient would be aware of it but this is not so in OCPD.

During my posting in psychiatry, I met a patient. It is amazing by how much you can learn by just observing a person's actions and this is not something that someone would normally do unless you have a lot of free time in the world. Well, I had that free time. At first, it was a bit odd because this person also has schizophrenia and so there were stories which my friends and I heard. After awhile, I noticed that this person would ask the same question at least 2 - 3 times even though an answer was given after a few minutes each time. Everything had to be proper it seemed. Arrangement of the things brought along, sitting posture, properly structured English sentences.

Initially, a few people laughed because it was weird to ask a question over and over again after being told the answer multiple times. But then later, I noticed that it was not weird at all and this person, I felt, was actually anxious and required reassurance. And I was right, this person did have OCPD. I felt that this was an amazing experience because it is sort of like getting a diagnosis right without being told. It is sort of like being able to pick up something just by observing and not just that, by listening to what patients have to say, they make the best teachers.

This is also one of the reasons why we are advised to spend more time in the hospital than to study books because everyone comes with a different presentation. One matter can overlap with another. One matter may predispose a person to another disease/problem. I guess what I am also trying to say is that mental illnesses is not something to joke about. Sure, it can be joked about among a circle of friends but not in front of a patient or stranger because it is a sensitive issue and that does not mean these patients do not deserve the care. I feel that they are the ones who deserve more care.

I met many doctors who inspired me and taught me these lessons of caring for a patient. Child psychiatry (Autism, Down's, learning disabilities etc) and neuropsychiatry (dealing with behavioural changes in Parkinson's, Alzheimer's etc) were two fields which caught my attention. It's not that doctors in other postings do not care about their patients but I suppose it is because in psychiatry, there just had to be extra attention to the patient's wellbeing.

At this point, how many are there who actually care for the patients? Back in Phase 1, we knew nothing about empathy. We were excited over cases, not patients. The more severe, serious and rare it was, the more excited we would be. But now, it is different. Sometimes, I find it depressing. I am yet to be able to deal with death well. I cried a lot when 2 patients whom I have been following up with since their admission passed away because I got to know what went wrong, how their lives have been and the suffering at the end. And I know that crying was normal.

#55

2011-06-16T23:30:00.002+08:00

The end of psychiatry posting means a beginning of a new one - orthopedics. I've been through paediatrics, obstetrics, family medicine, internal medicine and surgery. What do I like best?

I like the time I get in psychiatry. It is not as hectic as the others. Well, the time I have is similar to family medicine.

I like surgery because it is straightforward unlike in internal medicine wherby one thing can be caused by this and be affected by that etc. I find that surgery is similar to obstetrics because it is fixed. There is a problem, fix the problem, and it's settled. This is also a reason why I like obstetrics but only from the theoretical point of view.

I like the variety seen in both paediatrics and internal medicine but the scope is really wide. This makes me wonder if I would someday be competent in these fields if I chose to stick to either one. Nevertheless, speaking about psychiatry, it really is not too bad. I enjoyed my posting. I have learnt to empathize. Just because someone is mentally ill does not necessarily mean that they would be forever. With motivation, a person can make a difference in his/her own life.

For me, I am lucky to have motivation and support from a few friends. :) So, what's next? Well, there is another long case (practical which lasts for about 1 1/2 hours) in 5 weeks, OBA on psychiatry and orthopedics in 5 weeks, and one major exam (4 days in 2 weeks) in 7 weeks. Confusing, isn't it? This also kind of means that I probably may not have the time to update the blog as usual.

♥ 4

2011-05-26T10:17:00.000+08:00

I call this 'Scattered Hearts' but my friends preferred to call this 'Basket of Love'. I guess it depends on how you see it.

♥ 3

2011-05-23T10:16:00.000+08:00

We all know the song. :) And it was one of my favourite songs. So, I just had to make this.

For the record, it was not easy but I managed to turn a thought into something that can be seen physically. :) If held upside down, the hearts will drop out because I purposely left a slit there. This is A6 size as well.

Hama beads

2011-05-19T09:43:00.000+08:00

These are called hama beads. They are also known as Pyssla beads. I bought one whole container of it in Ikea as well as the boards which allows me to arrange the beads on.

...The beads...

...Beads arranged on the board...

You get the idea, right? So after you've arranged it on the board, place the butter paper which came along with the board on top of the beads and iron it. With various arrangements, you can make all sorts of things if you can think about it. I googled what other people have done before to get ideas and how they did it.

...First batch of creations...

...Various coloured ninjas...

I made these with my friends. Well, some people made key chains, magnets, earrings, accessories out of these and when I give it to my friends, I tell them to do whatever that they want with it because if it was me, I would probably try to make a bookmark out of it by sewing to a fabric.

This one is called 'Ninjas from all around the world, UNITE!' :)

Have a nice day everyone...

♥ 2

2011-05-16T10:16:00.000+08:00

Personally, I thought that the words are meaningful which was why I had to remake this. I think it would be nice if this could be made in a wallet-card size so then, when it is given to another person, the other person can carry it around wherever he/she goes. :)

So as you can see, this is done on a plain white paper. I followed how the fonts were in the original and the two characters because those were the things which captured my attention. I just added borders using the papers my mum bought for me from Japan a year back and in a way, I feel that the red makes it vibrant. This is probably not seen in the picture because I did not take a very good picture but I suppose, you get the idea. :)

♥ 1

2011-05-14T10:13:00.004+08:00

I get inspiration from IHeartLove sometimes. I see what I like and I reproduce in my own ways. The ideas are there, the messages are there but the pictures are not exactly the same.

This was one of the first few I've made. These are not A4 sized by the way. It is as small as a notebook, A6 in size.

If there is anything I would want to improve on, it would be the words, I think they could have been written more beautifully. :) But, I like the umbrella! I have never been able to carve a curve using a penknife but I guess because it is small, it was easier and the paper did not tear at all!

Well, I hope you'd like this collage as much as I do.

Door Sign 2

2011-05-11T12:12:00.004+08:00

I did this quite awhile ago. Maybe 2 months back when I had some free time for my housemates, Natashini and Siew Ting. Previously, I made one for my other housemate, Edmund *click to see link* and from there I made a couple of alterations so that this door sign can stick without damaging the back part.

I think in a way its easier to design something for a girl because flowers, red/pink and any sort of laces would do the trick. :) The papers are from Whimsical Articles. I bought them a few years ago, never exactly finished using it.

So, Natashini's door sign has got laces at the top and bottom border which were from Bukit Mertajam. I used the same lace when I made a book cover for my self. I think the design of the paper made it really complete because the colours are vibrant and strong. So, in designing this, there wasn't a lot of effort required except for cutting out the letters. :)

For Siew Ting's, I decided to choose a softer colour. The flowers are are also laces. But for this, I don't think I did a very good job in cutting out the names. I could have been much better and the longer the name, then the spacing and size of each letter has to be carefully planned out. It turned out alright. :) Again, I just let the paper do the work.

The size of these are half of an A4 and I sticked them on a hard card first, then on a thick plastic board.

#54

2011-02-05T13:22:00.002+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year :)

This year, I'm not so in the CNY mood because of there's an exam to study for. Well, it's not just my batch but the Semester 7 and 9 students will be sitting for their major exams too. What a timing, eh? I didn't go back to my hometown. Last year, I was in Bangkok during CNY but this year, I'm just at home. Well, I'm looking forward to my 2-week break after this coming week. :) Doing fun and exciting things are on my to-do list for real. :)

#53

2011-01-21T16:40:00.000+08:00

This whole week seem like a crazy week to me. Perhaps I'm already on the 'burnt out' phase and I'm slowly losing it. I can't seem to finish my work in time which frustrates me and more than ever, I am stressed because my practical exam is next week!

I'm not even half prepared. I doubt myself in the knowledge I know and on top of that, I feel like I don't know much. I know it is something which we all experience. Heck, I've even experienced this before but why can't I handle it better now? It could be because of the environment, the topics to study or just an inner self-conflict thing going on. One thing is for sure, I'm not giving up just yet although I'm about to. :/

On the contrary, as I've been homesick, my friend took me out for dinner yesterday. I think it was nice of him seeing that I'm so lazy to even step out of the house to get food for myself. :) Another friend of mine cooked something from home and I really really miss homecooked food. I've never taken my mum's cooking for granted. But, it's been awhile since she last cooked when I'm back home.

CONCENTRATE! (omg, my laundry is only halfway done, so many clothes to iron... :( and I guess at some point, I knew I'd come to situations like these. That is after all a student's life.)

#52

2011-01-16T14:24:00.002+08:00

I didn't go back home last weekend. Instead, I stayed back in Seremban where I spent most of my time alone at home. It was alright at first. I enjoyed the peace, the silence (because my neighbour moved and her dogs went with her as well)... until evening comes. That is when I start hearing weird sounds.

I know that I don't have a neighbour on my right. But, somehow, I keep hearing door closing and the creaks as if someone is downstairs or beside the wall. If it was from the neighbour on the left, then, it must be really loud because my housemate's room keeps my room separated from the neighbour on the left.

Yes, I did freaked out. Who wouldn't be? The last time I was home alone, there was a blackout for a few hours and I did not have a torchlight with me. Back then, my cellphone battery was also dying. Now, I keep everything charged :) There is a torchlight with me now. And, there is a hammer at home. That means if anyone comes without telling me who he/she is, the first thing I'll do is hit them, then only turn on the lights to see who it is. Safety first! :P

Purple Roses

2011-01-13T10:03:00.000+08:00

A friend of mine was curious about the rose I made for another friend. So, I thought my friend how to make them.

Petals cut out, stretched and tips rolled. I think we made 32 of those. 16 petals for each rose and then we glued it onto a green stick which I bought from a florist shop. It's a bit difficult to explain how the process is. Jien thought me how to do this 2 years back. I've only done 4 so far. The purple rose was my fifth.

*pretty* :)

Apparently, every colour has a different meaning. You could google to know more about it.

Handmade Card 6

2011-01-10T09:45:00.000+08:00

What do you do when you have very little/no time to plan a card design?
I would:
1) Find a friend to help me
2) Incorporate the essentials of a birthday card
.......i) Front cover
.......ii) The wish 'Happy Birthday'
.......iii) Message corner

And, that was what I did. If you've read a previous post about my creations, I mentioned that what I did last year was a mix and match of previous designs.

I honestly feel that it was not the best effort but I tried making it presentable. In total, there are 4 pages.

Page 1: Front cover

Page 2: Birthday wish

Page 3: Friend's contribution :)

Page 4: Message section and a rose with a lace to give it a 'feminine touch' ^^

Everything put together...

and binded...

It turns out to be some sort of like a calender. The idea is that it is up to my friend to display which page she feels like seeing for the day etc.

I was telling my friends that this picture looks emo because it seems like a story whereby the guy leaves a girl with a memory of a flower and no messages. But then again, it'd be weird because if he was going to leave the girl, why bother getting a rose or a card with design, right?

*imagination* :)

#51

2011-01-09T20:03:00.004+08:00

Everytime I find myself in the same situation, I'd think bout what my mum would say or have said to me:

1. "Let Ko finish his work. Don't disturb him..."
2. "Cry for what? Don't be silly... :) There's no point crying..."
3. "Just let it be. It's not your fault."
4. "Studies are more important than boys."

Of late, there has been many things crossing my mind. They don't retain, not even the academic stuff. I'm tired of thinking. I'm tired of listening. And, I know that if I stopped thinking and listening, then, I'm going to start losing out on things bit by bit. I refuse to believe that I'm heading towards the "burning out" phase even before the battle starts.

Door sign

2011-01-08T10:50:00.003+08:00

I did not have a lot of time to do handmade stuff last year mainly because I had a major exam to concentrate in which was EOS 5 and after moving Seremban, there was even less time to explore and experiment making new things.

After looking back at what my latest creation was in the list, I realised that it was a book cover. O.O And I thought, goodness, that was nearly a year ago! No wonder my skills got so rusty. Even when it came to using a penknife, I have tremors. It seems that the intricate movements or skills if I may call it are no longer there. Or maybe, it was because I was making stuff after playing badminton on the day before. Hence, muscle fatigue.

Perhaps the other reason was because I haven't felt inspired for awhile. So, I haven't got any fresh ideas to challenge myself with. Anyway, I did make a door sign for a friend. Once in awhile, I like giving surprises. :) It's not just for special occassions, but I sometimes do it upon requests or when I feel like it. Ideas and colour combinations from previous creations are mixed and matched.
I believe the size is nearly half of an A4 paper. It's simply just a 2 papers on top of another. The only thing that I found challenging was to approximate the size and spacing; and, to stitch using as little time possible. In my past creations, I would take up to a few days to prepare and finish it.

My friend was telling me that I could be selling this already. Well, maybe... but I thought differently because why would people buy when they can also make it themselves? Even now, there are door signs made out of wood etc. Maybe in future, it'd be different. I used to make wallet cards, but now, I see that they can be bought. Yet, I still like personalized items. :)

1.11.11

2011-01-01T20:29:00.003+08:00

Happy New Year everyone!

2010 was not particularly an interesting year for me as it was filled with exam stress which I could not handle and a change in lifestyle. Although 2011 will be filled with more exams and challenges, I know that I'll make the best of 2011.

As I looked back on my resolutions in 2010, I knew that I did not fulfill most of them mainly because they've been forgotten along the way. Hence, for this year, I tried making more reasonable and simple ones.

I found hope and love towards the end and I sure do hope that things would either maintain or be brought to a higher level in terms of friendship. Surely, there were many unforeseen occurences as well downfalls. That's what a new year is for, don't you think so?

A new year to me denotes a new beginning, a new start and a reason for me to think about everything that happened in the past year which I would want to improve on. I hope it'll be a good year ahead for every one. :)

'In Between' by Linkin Park

2010-12-21T17:41:00.003+08:00

Who would have thought that listening to Linkin Park could be therapeutic? I strangely found it helpful this evening. Perhaps it depicts my feelings and thoughts at this present moment. It has only been the second day of surgery and I feel like I've got loads to read up on, not just facts related to the surgical posting but the previous postings as well.

I've been wanting to update the latest creations. But, everytime I am about to write about it, I end up scraping the words typed. I somehow found the affinity for this song...

'In Between' by Linkin Park

Let me apologize to begin with
Let me apologize for what I'm about to say
But trying to be genuine was harder than it seemed
But somehow I got caught up in between

Let me apologize to begin with
Let me apologize for what I'm about to say
But trying to be someone else was harder than it seemed
And somehow I got caught up in between

[Chorus]
Between my pride and my promise
Between my lies and how the truth gets in the way
And things I want to say to you get lost before they come
The only thing that's worse than one is none

Let me apologize to begin with
Let me apologize for what I'm about to say
But trying to regain your trust was harder than it seemed
But somehow I got caught up in between

[Chorus]
Between my pride and my promise
Between my lies and how the truth gets in the way
The things I want to say to you get lost before they come
The only thing that's worse than one is none
The only thing that's worse than one is none

And I cannot explain to you
And anything I say or do or plan
Fear is not afraid of you
But guilt's a language you can understand
I cannot explain to you
And anything I say or do
I hope the actions speak the words they can

[Chorus]
For my pride and my promise
For my lies and how the truth gets in the way
The things I want to say to you get lost before they come
The only thing that's worse is

Pride and my promise
Between my lies and how the truth gets in the way

The things I want to say to you get lost before they come
The only thing that's worse than one is none
The only thing that's worse than one is none
The only thing that's worse than one is none

Unwanted by Avril Lavigne

2010-12-07T16:57:00.003+08:00

OSCE is in 2 weeks. Although it's just 15 minutes, but I guess we're all looking at the bigger picture where there is another exam in 9 weeks. :/ This song was playing on my iPod earlier and that was I felt for awhile. *sigh*

Unwanted by Avril Lavigne

All...
That I did was walk over
Start off by shaking your hands
That's how it went
I had a smile on my face
and I sat up straight

Oh yeah yeah
I wanted to know you
I wanted to show you

(Chorus)
You don't know me
Don't ignore me
You don't want me there
You just shut me out
You don't know me
Don't ignore me
If you had your way
You just shut me up
Make me go away

(I'm so unwanted)

No...
I just don't understand why
You won't talk to me
It hurts that I'm so unwanted for nothing
Don't talk words against me

I wanted to know you
I wanted to show you

(Chorus)
You don't know me
Don't ignore me
You don't want me there
You just shut me out
You don't know me
Don't ignore me
If you had your way
You just shut me up
Make me go away

I tried to belong it didn't seem wrong
My head aches
It's been so long
I'll write this song
If that's what it takes

(Chorus x2)
You don't know me
Don't ignore me
You don't want me there
You just shut me out
You don't know me
Don't ignore me
If you had your way
You just shut me up
Make me go away

Make me go away yeh yeh yeh
Make me go away

It'd be nice to be able to remember what I've studied.

#50

2010-11-29T23:52:00.004+08:00

Recently, I have been having a flow of thoughts which I can't control and I have been thinking about many things. Along with these thoughts were also the various negative emotions: anger, sadness, frustrated, fear which were changing almost constantly. The main topic was friendship. When problems arise, how does one deal with it then? When there is a communication breakdown, how do we go about it? When both sides continue to keep things to themselves and finally let out, how bad would the impact be?

It was mainly my fault anyway when recently things didn't go too well. Unknowingly, I've been insensitive. I tried to patch things up and to some extent, I figured that things may not go back to being normal like how it used to be. With exams coming up, reports to submit, research to conduct, time is being sacrificed and it stresses me out. I find that I'm unable to cope a few things at a time.

TRY --> that's all I can do now, with no promises. :( I don't know if it'll work, but at least, I tried... I guess.

I made too many wishes tonight. One of it had a 'If only it didn't happen...' meaning. Uncertainty is something I am facing as well. There is always a possibility, likelihood, a chance. Like what people would normally say, "Give it some time. Only time can tell."

At this point, I don't know what to expect of the friendship. I believe there would be a situation where there is nothing to talk about. I'm sure many of us experience the same thing. It's just that we have different ways to handle it. Sometimes, I don't understand how I keep making mistakes which results in countless "cold wars" over the past 3 months. In the end, I'll be back to asking myself if the friendship was worth fighting for. Was it too much of a burden? Did it do me any good? Did it bring harm to the other person? Questions, questions, and questions...

#49

2010-11-25T18:05:00.003+08:00

I feel frustrated how things don't go the right way or doesn't fall into place when I expect it to. I remember being told that without expectations, you won't get hurt and I do find some truth in it. I guess unknowingly, I have expectations in the things I do, the way I do it, in my friends and stuff.

Since last week itself, I've been looking forward to doing something fun - catch a new movie, play frisbee or some sort of activity. But, it has been interrupted by the weather and time does not allow me to do the things I want to do. More importantly, I did not want to do them alone. It is impossible to play frisbee on my own and watching a movie alone is just sad.

I've been wanting to watch Harry Potter 7 (Part 1). Either I had no time to watch with friends who wanted to watch it, no one is interested in watching it with me or everyone else watched it already but me. :/ I heard that Megamind is good too but I haven't been able to watch it because the timing clashes with my schedule and no one wants to watch a night movie. Otherwise, everyone including me would be tired by the end of the day or the movie is no longer showing in that particular cinema.

So from last week, it was moved to this week. And the plans that were supposed to "happen" fell apart day by day. Now that I'm already reaching the end of the week, I haven't done any fun activity and feel couped up at home with nothing but BOOKS, BOOKS and MORE reading material that needs to be covered but never quite covered.

*sigh*

5 things that made me :)

2010-11-21T11:48:00.003+08:00

Sometimes, all I want is a holiday, a button to 'Pause' whatever that has been happening so that I can 'Rewind' and reflect; and probably 'Fast Forward' to anticipate what's going to happen. Then, I get back to the point where I paused and hit the 'Play' button again.

'Things happen for a reason...' people say. It sounds vague, meaningless until something significant really does happen because most of the time, I wouldn't know what the reason is. I get stuck thinking about what the reason may be and not move on to embrace what is being offered for me to learn and appreciate.

It was difficult to think about or do the things which makes me happy. In Seremban, I have no time to dance and even if I do, I have no space. Dancing in a park is a 'NO' for me. The next thing which makes me happy would be playing the piano but unfortunately, the keyboard in the clinical school has been taken away for a project and the piano at home hasn't been tuned. Taking pictures used to be something I love but it was rather inconvenient to bring a camera around the clinical school to take pictures. It would be weird since the atmosphere is always so tensed.

Then, I realise that it's the little things that count. If I stopped thinking about all the problems which multiplies by 2 every time I think about them and just observe how things work around me or how things are around me, I'd probably see something beyond sick or dying people,..

...no dark and twisted place for the mind to be trapped.

So, the relatively little things which I came across last week which made me a bit happier:

1) Interesting accessories

No matter where I go, it seems like I can't run away from Medicine. :) Honestly, I've only met a handful of nurses who are nice to students. Most nurses I previously met were mean but in this posting, I've met nice ones who are willing to teach. Back to the earrings, ^^ they are adorable and the only pair left. I did not get it though because I did not think it would be appropriate to wear it in the hospital setting and I did not want to be reminded of work when I'm out with my friends. Ooh, and it was RM9.90.

2) Kids

I love children mainly because they are still naive and they are easy to read. They don't or hardly hide their emotions when they are sad, angry, annoyed. When they are happy, they are living the moment. That is something I need to do : Live the moment before it passes by and I missed it completely.

3) Bright colours

You have to admit that bright colours really does lighten a person's mood. Bright colours are the opposite of emo. I can't possibly think of anything emo when I see yellow, orange and light blue. :) Although Pooh looks jaundiced most of the time, Pooh does not emo. (the movie is coming out next year!)

4) Art

I love creativity. I love to see the creativity of individuals in process or in end result. It inspires me in a way that it reminds me to challenge myself to think out of the box. I have been avoiding the challenges I faced. As a result, I don't get far when my peers do once they overcome them one after the other. I guess my coping mechanism is different from them or mine has got a defect in it.

5) Seeing things from a different angle through a different lense

'take one step at a time with me until we reach the end'

Baby steps are important in getting back up and going back to finish what you started. It's not easy to take baby steps when there's no one around to encourage and give moral support. Just think about it... a baby has to be encouraged to crawl, move and walk around. When they fall and hurt themselves, they just need to have someone to hold their hands so that they feel secure and if they fall again, it would not be as bad as the first time. :)

#48

2010-11-09T01:56:00.002+08:00

Many said that Family Medicine posting is one of the most relaxing postings in Semester 6. Strangely, I do not find it true. Honestly, I prefer Internal Medicine over Family Medicine. I've been trying to adjust to the new setting in the Klinik Kesihatan. This is the second week and it is also around this time where external assignments start to gush in like a flood that you have to control.

Every day, I have a different list of things to do and I do not have time to study. At the moment, I'm just concentrating on the research proposal which is going to be presented to my tutor this Thursday. :) Yeah, I'm excited about it because I think the research topic is quite interesting and I'd like to believe that I can do it although many do not support the idea. Plus, I've been putting a lot of thought into the proposal. It's not perfect but MAYBE, just maybe... in the next 2 days, I'd be able to change and add in more information to make it presentable. :)

Yes, I do find the stress load crazy to the point where I can't handle it at times but I've got 2 people to thank for for helping me through. :) I am starting believe now that 'Friends come and go. Good and close friends come and stay.'

#47

2010-11-07T21:08:00.003+08:00

I was listening to Broken by Lifehouse and I decided to search the lyrics and I came across this in one of the verses.

Hmm, I don't think I know how to breath barley... And, I don't think the artists did too. :P

0.2 degrees hotter :D

2010-11-06T13:16:00.004+08:00

Last week, there was a CSU class where we injected oranges, tomatoes but not each other. It was sort of like a playtime for us because we also got the opportunity to prick our friend's fingers to test for the random blood glucose using the Glucometer. Mine was 4.6 mmol/L. I'm normal!

We got to break ampules which I'm afraid of because I think that everything will shatter in my grip. Injecting oranges was kind of fun. But, one thing which I would not forget was the time we took each other's temperature.

So, my friend's temperature was 36.4 degrees Celcius. We were in an air-conditioned room. I thought it would at least be 37 degrees but anyway...
Mine was 36.6 degrees. :)

15 SECONDS LATER...

#46

2010-11-04T23:52:00.002+08:00

This weekend is going to be filled with Maroon 5 songs. :)

I didn't have class in the afternoon, so, I followed Natashini back to Klang. I slept throughout the journey. I've never been able to stay awake for long journeys as such unless I'm the one driving. It was nice to have 2 bowls of porridge for lunch. It's been awhile (4 days) since I had home-cooked food. My friend noticed a decrease in appetite which I would not deny but it's picking up now. After lunch, I slept for another 4 hours. I think it was probably one of the worst dreams I've got. It felt like a 4-hour lecture on the differences between Family Medicine and Internal Medicine. argh.

Some people say that what we dream usually reflects what we did during the day. There was a 4 hour lecture this morning and also for the past 3 days, it has been an intensive training to listen. I didn't do quite well in that because I do end up falling asleep in the middle of lectures. The sleepiness is worsened by lunch.

I do not know how my friends stay awake no matter how sleepy they are. I've got to learn that ability.

#45

2010-11-04T02:30:00.002+08:00

After 7 weeks of Internal Medicine posting, I'm now in Family Medicine. The system is a little different and I feel a bit lost as to what I'm supposed to do and how it should be done. Also, the setting is different.

But, putting that aside, I've been neglecting my Research Proposal and have postponed it for the past 3 days. Deepavali is just around the corner. :) It means 4 days of holiday for me! (weekends included) Last Sunday, I had a henna done on my left hand. Well, it's beginning to fade already. I'd like to have more henna done but I think it's only professional to keep the hands free from any designs etc.

Just awhile ago, I did something which I haven't done in a LOOONG while. :) ARTSTUFF! Well, I haven't got much ideas lately. So, I just played around with prints, colours and lace. I need some inspiration. I haven't got the mood to do anything lately either. That means, since Family Medicine started, I've been neglecting my studies a bit. :/

#44

2010-10-20T16:16:00.005+08:00

Since this is the 44th post, and the number 4 is related to death, I decided to write something related to that. Anyway, I had a TBL earlier and someone was presenting a case. I don't know if I heard incorrectly but I ended up laughing a lot when I thought about how a mix up in English can hmm.., give a different meaning.

There is one part in presenting the case where we have to mention about the family history. Normally, I would say "So-and-so passed away due to unknown reason" or in a different scenario, "So-and-so passed away and the reason, well, there was none given." I never quite fancy the word 'die', so I would usally use 'passed away' instead. Today I thought I heard someone said:

'So-and-so died for no reason'

=.=lll

It sounds offensive in a way but still, it is still funny how things, words, and sentences changes when one is nervous. Even 'Can you please push against my hand?' can become 'Can you resist me?' in a corny way.

The past two weeks have been corny. :)

Magic :)

2010-10-11T22:03:00.003+08:00

One thing about the hospital which I don't really like is how the people just talk through the face mask. I can hardly hear what they say and it is as though they mumble. Most of the time, I would have to double check by repeating what they have said. Anyway, there was one time in the ward when I saw a houseman putting an ice pack on the tray. I wondered what it was for... So, I asked him and I thought I heard this...
Honestly, that was what I heard and that was what I perceived his sentence to be. MAGIC =.= At first, I was a little frustrated because I was thinking why on earth would he treat me like a kid. "Magic?" I asked the second time and I was ignored. I asked what the ice pack was for again and he turned to his colleague and spoke to her. I got so frustrated and finally asked again and he told me that it was actually for ABG (Arterial Blood Gas) blood sample. The blood is cooled so that it wouldn't clot before it's put in the machine.

For the rest of the 1/2 hour, I was wondering about how people around me react to me. As I was "reflecting" about it, my housemate told me...
Yeah, I was more mad at him after that. He didn't understand it at first but after telling him what happened, he just can't stop mentioning the MAGIC word - Magic. When I go like "Eh, how did you do that?", instead of getting an explanation, I get "Ooh, it's MAGIC! ^^"

#43

2010-10-06T12:23:00.000+08:00

With so many changes in timetable for this week, I think we need to de-stress a little... So, here's a lame medical joke/question...

*Let's think about it for awhile... :) *

*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*

GRAVES' DISEASE

M.I. ?

2010-10-04T11:45:00.000+08:00

Making lame jokes hasn't been a part of my life entirely. But, I believe that it is lame jokes which makes people smile and laugh. It is rare that you hear a cool joke which makes you laugh. This time, it was not exactly a joke but rather, a question that was very well phrased. :) My brother gave me the idea as he was talking about Myocardial Infarction that day. Medical students would know that it's M.I. for short.

So, this was what happened...

Try reading the sentence out loud. It'll sound like 'Am I affecting your heart? True or Fales?'

There were many responses. Many said it was lame. Many did not want to answer. Those who said no, well... I told them that they're wrong because it really does affect the heart. :) There was a few who said Yes without realising what it meant. Oh wells... :)

Mini-CEX 2

2010-10-03T11:08:00.003+08:00

Mini-CEX is a formative assessment. Mini-CEX 1 is based on history taking whereas Mini-CEX 2 is based on physical examination. My Mini-CEX 1 was rescheduled and will be held tomorrow morning. This means I had my Mini-CEX 2 earlier and that was last Monday. It was the first assessment. I was not exactly nervous but I was unsure about a lot of things. Okay, maybe 5% + 50% nervous. I guess it was mainly because I did not prepare for MSK OSCE and CNS came out instead.

When things are right and I go wrong, I get mixed up unintentionally... :/

My friend said that I shouldn't be a surgeon then because when I get nervous, I'll end up cutting the wrong thing. =.= I wouldn't say it's entirely true because we are all nervous when it comes to doing things for the first time. By the time I do graduate, I would have at least that amount of confidence to not mix things up. I can make mistakes now, learn and remember it for life.

Last Monday, I was on the patient's left side because his bed was situated next to the wall. It was not an excuse definitely to get things mixed up. But, my point was proven when my friend who gave me the remark got mixed up with his Left and Right :P

Anyway, I thought things would end really badly mainly due to the "anatomy" above. When I commented about rigidity, I said that the person had 'Hypotonia with rigidity'. One thing which many should know is that I'm the last person to know stuff. If there's a group of students who answered correctly and one who doesnt, that one person would most likely be me.

I thought I might end up being scolded because I saw the VARIOUS expressions in my friends who took the exam before me. I was sweating a lot, smiling in a weird way and trying to not say silly things since I'm so prone to that. There were 5 of us. I went 5th. But, in a way, I learnt many things...

When I was first asked about whether there's a hard ice cream, I was thinking 'Yeah... those with ice as the outer layer. That's so hard that you can't straight away bite it. There are also those which have been kept in the freezer for so long that if you use a plastic spoon to scoop it, the spoon might just break. If there are chocolate chips in the ice cream, it's probably as hard as stone...'

But common sense comes in, we know that the IDEAL ice cream is semi-soft on a cone.

54 Cupcakes!

2010-09-19T14:59:00.003+08:00

Yesterday, my mum asked me if I wanted to bake because it has been awhile since I last did any. Plus, I had the ingredients already, so, why not? I took this chance to try two new recipes --> Apple Raisins and Banana Chocolate Chip. I also made some Lemon Raisins and Butter Raisins. If you're wondering why there are so many raisins, it's because my family (more specifically, my mum) prefers raisins over chocolate chips.

All together, I made 54 cupcakes in about 3 1/2 hours. I work slow although I have the mixer. Some of the cupcakes are for friends, housemates, family and myself.

Since my mum didn't like to have a topping, I made a small amount of chocolate buttercream to go with the banana chocolate chips. Previously, my friends told me that it was too sweet because of the amount of icing. So, I've pretty much reduced them by half. I think it's still going to be sweet.

..Banana chocolate chips with chocolate buttercream..

My sis-in-law helped me with the decorations. :) I thought it turned out pretty alright.

The ones on the left are Apple Raisins while the one on the right are Lemon Raisins. If you see carefully, on the last row, third from the left, there is a slightly darker coloured cupcake and that's the banana chocolate chip without the icing.

My brother took a panaromic view of the cupcakes..

..I kind of adore the hearts. ;)..

So... the apple raisins didn't turn out as nice as I thought it would be but the banana chocolate chip did. :) If you were counting the cupcakes in the picture, you wouldn't get 54 because my brother didn't take pictures of the Butter raisins. heh.

Alright, time to go to Klang.

Video: Don't Want An Ending by Sam Tsui

2010-09-14T12:02:00.003+08:00

Do you remember the time when I posted up this video from youtube 'Nothing Left Unsaid' ? Well, you could check it out here. I stumbled upon the song just now and this is it. :) I like it.

It's truly another spectacular work of Kurt Hugo and Sam Tsui remains amazing. If you're interested, they also just made a mashup 'Love the Way You Lie'. *click! it's just one click away*

Growing up step by step

2010-09-13T03:00:00.001+08:00

Some people say that when you're away from home, you'll learn to grow up. Who would have thought that I would have learn a few lessons so early myself. Lucky me, huh.

On the first week itself, I learnt to get from one place to the other using my GPS. Well, I got lost while trying to go home. Yeah, and some of my housemates would never let me forget that. At the same time, I learnt about the importance of having a spare tire which has air and being observant.

So, there was this one time, my friends and I went out for dinner. We decided to try this Thai food somewhere which I can't quite recall the way to go there. I drove that day. I decided to use the flyover, not that there was anything wrong with it. As I was driving... I thought I heard something fell off. I remember that now.

I did not know what it was. I thought it was the petrol cover which came out which was not possible. I thought it was the car boot which wasn't properly closed. Or maybe, I just ran over something hard.

I did not drive the next day. But I do somehow have a faint memory of seeing a round silver coloured thingy on the roads. It was around midnight when my housemate asked me if I noticed anything wrong with my car and I said, 'I don't think so.' I asked him instead, 'What did you see?' He told me that it seems like one of my car tires look darker than the other.

It was sort of like SPOT the DIFFERENCES! 1 point only. The only thing different is that instead of having two pictures in front of me, it was memory work. Then we noticed that one of my tire "rims" came out. It's not exactly rims, but for a Proton car, it's sort of like the cover for the tire. Thinking back about it now, that must have been the sound I heard.

We tried looking out for it the following day and we didn't see it. Thinking back about it now, I think it was because when I drive, I usually use the flyover whereas my friend would use an alternative route. Lesson to learn: Be observant, stay alert and take good care of things that have been entrusted to you. :)

Ohh, and for the record, nah... my friend wasn't that paranoid as in the picture. He was quiet through out the whole journey. :P

RESET!

2010-09-11T23:18:00.003+08:00

Thank goodness for the Raya holidays. The timing could not be any more perfect for me to take a break and clear my mind. The past week has been a blurr to me which means, I did not know what to do in the wards and I did not quite know how to juggle my time.

By the time I reach home at 6pm (the earliest), I would feel like taking a shower and just do something other than studying. Talk about TBLs, there were so many confusion and I felt that it was definitely not a productive week. Besides that, there were many overlaps in the patients to clerk because some patients have been clerked for at least 3 times! That is why having holidays around this time is just nice.

It's a RESET Button! :)

This holidays should be spent on studying, no doubt. Unlike Phase 1 where there's only 3 systems per semester, at this stage, the curriculum is like jumping from CVS on one week to Respi on another followed by Renal on the following etc. I hope you get my drift. The point is that everything studied should have been retained/reabsorbed rather than excreted from the mind itself. But, I believe that in time, we'll all be able to catch up. *hopefully*

#42

2010-09-05T14:44:00.002+08:00

One week without home internet is surprisingly something I could live with. Although there is internet in the uni, I'm still reluctant to bring my laptop as the battery can't live for more than 15 minutes even though it's 100% charged. Occassionally, I can facebook through my phone or the computers in the library but I doubt I would have that enthusiasm to go to the library.

The first week has been alright. It's just briefings anyway. The white-coat ceremony was on Thursday. I've been having difficulties adjusting to the new environment. Hence, I don't get good quality sleep unlike my housemates. Hopefully, this week would be better. At least, there's holiday on this coming Friday which means I get to come home on a Thursday. :)

I just finished my ethics essay yesterday and it was difficult to regurgitate 400 words when I didn't know what to write about exactly. Although it's supposed to be about reflection on the online course about ethics, heck, I can't quite reflect unless I'm really in the position to make an ethical decision. At this point, everything is also just in the mind.

Well, it is orientation night tomorrow (Monday) and I have no idea what I am going to do yet. I'm not eager and I'm definitely not looking forward to it. The traditional dance that is. I am, however, looking forward to taking pictures and more of that. You may think that I lack the spirit of teamwork, but I don't think it's just me that feels this way. Limiting the sketches, dances or whatsoever to the theme of 'One Malaysia' is something that makes me feel like 'I'd rather not'.

#41

2010-08-29T11:21:00.002+08:00

I suppose about 9 years ago, it was my brother who moved to Seremban because the clinical school is there. I didn't understand why but I knew I was somewhat glad because there would be one person less to argue with me. But, I didn't know that it was from that day onwards, he'll be separated from the family for quite some time as in not living under the same roof for at least 2 years although he comes back and visit and spend time with me over the weekends at times. What happens after that was he getting posted to different hospitals which my family have to travel to to visit him and marriage.

Today, it's my turn...

I've moved my things to Seremban. It'll be my first night there tonight. I'll still come back during certain weekends. Reason being is that I didn't spend my holidays doing things I want to do. I did not have the adventure I want nor outings with my friends. I did not finish the dance choreographies nor the music playing. Seremban is surely a different adventure which I think many would have mixed feelings about. But, I do hope that one day, I'd still be able to go back and live under one roof like I always did.

My "Half"-Convocation

2010-08-22T00:21:00.007+08:00

*plays Hogwarts song*

Yesterday, I attended the convocation in my university. Although I was not one of those who would be a doctor, pharmacist or dentist, we received our certificate of completion of Phase 1. So, we'll be going to a clinical school soon, depending on what we've chosen. So, I'll be moving to Seremban to complete the second phase. That's why it's only "half" a convocation.

Anyway, the convocation was divided into 2 sessions. I was in the second session. I woke up at about 7.30am in the morning and realised that my graduation robe was not ironed. So, it was pretty much a last minute work. Lucky, I didn't end up being late. :)

..My batchmates before entering the auditorium. All lining up in alphabetical order..

Since Pam stayed over at my place and accompanied me to my half-convo, she was also my photographer for the day.

..Me and Nirmal..

..Jae Ric, Me and Jeremy..

..MORE of my batchmates and I..

..Me and Soon Lee..

..Me and Emi Khoo who won a Merit Award for being the second in my batch..

..Me and Thomas who is the Gold Medallist in my batch..

..Me and Rudy the talented Musician..

..Yaw Shing, Koon Hau, Chin Nam and Thomas..

..PAMELA! (who is currently addicted to the series, Pretty Little Liars)..

..Me and Mr Alex who gives lecturers which you'll never want to miss because it's so good, funny and interesting even though it is related to Behavioural Science..

*Hogwarts song still playing :P*

..The Lecturers..

..Me and Nirmal again ^^..

She gave a really good speech. She said something like 'In life, if you end up last, people would call you a loser. In med school, if you end up last, people would still call you a doctor.' I wish I could remember more details about the speech but if there was any impact made, it was that point which she said. Well, there was one other thing too... Students compete to be the best in their batch but no matter what, there'll only be on spot at the top. Then, many turned to look at Thomas (the top scorer). hehe.

As for the collection of the scroll, well, I kind of screwed up a bit. I didn't quite look at the camera. Oh well, I'll do better in 2 1/2 years time. :D

..Me and Benedict..

..Sandip, Me and Benedict (who did that on purpose)..

..Dr Ranjit and I..

After taking the batch photograph, I returned my robe and collected my academic transript and my certificate. I had lunch (which wasn't that nice) and went home to sleep for a few hours. I was really tired. It was an eventful day I suppose. Perhaps the one in 2 1/2 years would be a more exciting one. :)

#40

2010-08-21T08:09:00.002+08:00

Half-convocation in less than 3 hours. Yesterday was the rehearsal and I did a couple of mistakes. Hopefully, all turns out well today. I try to remind myself that it's just probably 5 seconds to take the scroll and 20 seconds to walk.

(by Pam) and i love pamela tan! (: BWAHAHAHAHA!

#39

2010-08-18T12:04:00.003+08:00

It's going to be 2 busy weeks ahead. I haven't got much time to write and upload the pictures I've been taking to my laptop. I was working last Monday and will be returning this coming Monday as the new Medicine intake is coming in and I'll be helping with their registration.

I met up with Pam again yesterday. :) I watched Curse of the Deserted. It was out long time ago but I just had time to watch it yesterday. That is pretty much it.

Sometimes, I don't feel like talking or interacting much with people. Some might say it's not very nice and that I should be polite blah blah blah, well, I don't really care about it these days. I've reached the point of 'Whatever... I seriously don't care about what you said/did or what you did not say/do'. The world doesn't revolve around me or you.

Dinner at Shogun

2010-08-09T23:39:00.000+08:00

I've been craving for Japanese buffet for quite some time. So, I finally went to Shogun yesterday with my family. I don't think I managed to conquer all the food because I don't think my stomach can stretch to fit all sorts of food.

I started off with the sushi, sashimi and cheese-baked mussels.

Then, I had some sort of salmon salad with sesame sauce. But, I felt that the vegetable was a bit bitter and I didn't like the addition of spinach in this. I feel like the taste did not blend in. >.< There was also a selection of Thai food and dimsum as well as some fried food but I did not get those. Instead, I was more curious to try the pasta! I've been watching the Korean drama 'Pasta' and it has made me curious about the different types of food.

So, the next stop... Pasta and cheese-baked oysters. :)
The pasta was really creamy and I really liked it. But, I didn't quite like the cheese-baked oyster. I couldn't tell what the red sauce was because it did not taste like chilli nor tabasco to me.

There was a wide selection of soup too including tomyam but the tomyam was too sour for my liking. Since I haven't had miso soup for a really long time, I took that instead and added seaweed as well as tofu according to my liking. The spring onions was not a good idea. It took away most of the taste. Maybe, I did not soak it long enough or maybe, it wasn't supposed to be in the soup. (".)??

I had tempura too! It was alright. Tempuras somehow taste the same everywhere. I tried some oysters too. Raw ones. I'd prefer mussels over oysters though. :) Imagine eating it and discover a pearl in it. Escargots. Hmm, it was my first time trying it. My brother liked it. I've never had it before.

Well, I thought it was alright at first. "Mm.. chewy. crunchy. not bad. texture is okay. it's new. it's acceptable." But then, I was thinking about the snail. The tentacles, eyes, internal organs? What made it crunchy or chewy? Then, I felt bad because snails are the good ones. Although they are slow, they don't bite. (I'm assuming that they don't.) Plus, they are cute. I've never touched one. But, when I was a kid, I loved looking at them, trying to figure them out.

Snail mail. You've heard the term before, right? Snails carry mails :P And, when a snail becomes a meal, the mail never reaches the recipient. It dies in the line of duty. :( Anyway, putting the lameness aside, I think I won't be eating any more snails for the next couple of years.

I also had cawan mushi and more sashimi! :D Moving on to desserts...

Green tea ice cream! ^^ I love green tea ice cream. I had 3 scoops of it. I would have more if I could but I had to make space for the other types of desserts.

*ice cream.. ice cream.. ice cream ^^*

Green tea cake on the left and 5 mochi in the center. On the right is a pumpkin dessert. Well, there are 3 different colours. The green ones have honeydew paste inside while the pink ones had red bean paste and the white ones, I believe, have sesame paste.

The pumpkin dessert was alright. I just didn't know that the white coloured part was actually coconut. I don't really like coconut unless its a drink.

There was konyaku jelly too. The so-called orange cheesecake was not cheesecake. I think among all, I like the honeydew mochi and the green tea ice cream best. :)

Next stop, hopefully, UMAI-YA!

My Water Moments With TX5 at Mali Cove

2010-08-08T14:30:00.000+08:00

Thanks to the invite from Nuffnang, I finally got my Sony TX5. There was an event organized by Sony in Mali Cove, Sunway Lagoon yesterday.

I went there with my brother and sister-in-law. It took us 1/2 hour to find the place because I didn't know where the Ministry of Sound was and what more, Mali Cove.

By the time I got there, I was a bit lost. I did not know what the itenary was despite there being a schedule but what was written on it were mostly workshops on how to use the TX5. By the time I got to know that in order to play the games, you have to find a group of 5 people and sign up, it was already too late as all the teams were full. So, I ended up sitting and watching people.

I bumped into a highschool friend. She didn't turn out to be that friendly. I bumped into an IMU friend. She turned out to be awesome and making my day so much better. :)

..Me and Pei Jin..

I saw her from afar but wasn't sure if it was her but then we somehow met in the middle of the wave pool and found out that our stuff were just side by side. Hers on the table and mine on the bench. Well, she played the games and her team won first place! Well, top 5 groups out of the 25 went home with either a Sony TX5 camera, mp3, camcorders etc. Lucky them. :)

I always feel alienated when it comes to events. I don't like crowds because I know that most of the time, I don't blend in. Moreover, my brother didn't want to play in the water with me. So, my sister-in-law did and although she's small, boy oh boy can she splash water pretty well. The only way I can make her stop is by holding on to her hands. >.< This is Mali Cove. I've been asking my friends if they know what/where Mali Cove is and none could give me an answer.

I also asked what the dresscode was because I really did not know what to expect when the attached email mentioned 'My Water Moments with TX5'. Was it games involving water like water balloons and water guns? At least, that was what I had in mind. The reply I had was to wear comfortable clothes as I could get a little wet.

No, I did not end up a little wet. I ended up soaked. heh.

Oh and there was also this guy, Juztin Lau who went to sing. No, I do not know who he is nor did I understand what he was singing because it was in Chinese and apparently, he's the winner of the Astro Talent Quest 2009. Was the crowd enthusiastic? Not really.

So anyway, while Pei Jin was waiting for the other groups to finish their games, we went to get some pictures taken. Photographers: our brothers. Well, my brother took most of them since he had nothing to do.

Pei Jin's brother took this one! Of us by the "shore".

Well, we were just doing what the kids did when they slided down. Heh. They are just soooo adorable!

..Us by the kid's slide. There's even a lifeguard in yellow..

..Us on the slide.. :)

Whether we did slide down or not, well, I'll just have to leave you with suspense to wonder.

..Us at the shock-proof station..

Well, there are 5 game stations of which each represents a special feature of the Sony TX5. In the shock-proof station, the participants had to throw a number of camera dummies into the container according to the colour. The team which manages to accomplish the task in the shortest time will win that station.

..Us at the temperature-proof station. I had no idea what was going on here..

"I say Brr.. *clap* *clap* *stomp* *clap* It's cold in here. I say there must be some IMUians in the atmosphere"

..I have no idea what we were doing haha. Just posing for the camera!..

INCOMINGGGG...!!!

*smileeeee*

..I tried Yoga..

..More of me and Pei Jin..

..JUMP SHOT! :D Must have when there are two cheerleaders..

..Last picture of the day..

I won't be using the Sony TX5 just yet because I still need to get a memory stick, screen protector and a casing. Ooh, I've got the pink one by the way. :)

#38

2010-08-03T08:23:00.000+08:00

I don't think I'm getting lamer, but cooler.

Me: Hey, you know... I can make a table without a saw. :D
Friend: Huh? How do you do that?
Me: Think about it... I can do it. You can do it.
Friend: You don't make sense. =.=
Me: C'mon... Use Microsoft Excel laaa....
Friend: Lame la you..

Later that day,

Friend: I went to the ATM Machine to draw money.
Me: You went to draw money? Amazing. *gives her look ^^*
Friend: What, Esther?
Me: Nothing. I can't draw money because I'm not an artist. :D
Friend: O.O oh my gawd, that's LAMERRR... =.=ll

#37

2010-08-01T09:17:00.001+08:00

I found this on a web while surfing one day and I can't help but think it's cute. :)

What do you think Twilight fans and non-Twilight fans? hehe..

"Hamburger" Cupcakes

2010-07-30T08:24:00.000+08:00

Plan: To make cupcakes with strawberry jam as the filling in the center.

..Strawberries and jam in a tin..

Well, the idea was there but I don't think I managed to do what I had in mind. I ended up creating a layer of jam in the middle. Hence, turning it into "hamburger" cupcakes. I did not realise this until I tried one. I thought the jam would somehow stick or turn into something else. I guess it didn't. heh. :D

..Somehow, I keep on thinking about ice cream every time I look at the picture..

..It was a recipe for 20 cupcakes which ended up becoming enough for only 12. >.< ..

..You could see the layers over here. I added raisins just to decorate it and I wanted to know where they would end up after baking it..

..Mixture in the oven and this is the part where I went "OhMyGosh, my cupcakes are MUTATING! O.O "..

Well, some of them didn't out to be so nice but hey, it's not about looks. It's the inside that counts. ^^ They turned out to be larger than the normal cupcakes but weren't exactly muffin-size. So, I guess it was alright.

As you can see, some of them are like aliens. Are you looking at the same cupcake as me? Alright, let me show you the one that I looked at all the time.

..This one!..

..The normal looking one :) ..

Did the plan work in the end? Nope.
Did I have a back up plan? Nope.
What did I learn from this? Take risks and learn while you still can in anything you do especially when it doesn't involve lives and when you know it won't harm anyone.

Before I forget (again)...

It has been 5 years and nearly 1 month. Yes, I do count the years. ^^

The Day I Watched Eclipse...

2010-07-29T00:34:00.005+08:00

... was the day I had a really good dinner. No arguments about that. I watched Eclipse with Lydia and Pam was supposed to join us but she had stuff to attend to. Well, I think pretty much everyone had read something about Eclipse, so, I'm not going to talk about it over here.

..Lydia's main meal which was Tempura Udon..

..I ordered cold soba..

..which came with deep fried chicken and salad..

..as well as the "soup" for dipping..

Some of my friends and family members know that this is my favourite meal out of the others. :) Ever since I tried it, I would order the same thing every time I go to Zanmai.

Besides that, we ordered sushi...! Okay, not a lot of sushi because we had our own budget too...

..mushrooms! We ordered because it was cheap and also because it was good. and the other which I can't remember what it is or called, i like that too..

..raw scallop and salmon..

It was my first time trying the raw scallop. I didn't have a good impression about at first since it looked pink and pink reminds me of the colour red which reminds me of blood. In other words, pink reminded me of meat with blood not washed completely.

..soft shell crab sushi..

I didn't think I'd like this too because I thought it's ridiculous to eat the shell although many say it is edible. If shells are edible, why do people generally not eat prawn shells?

..Ooh, salmon and mayonnaise with wasabi-ed roe..

That's about the food we had that evening. Ooh, after that, we shared an Oreo Cheesecake from Secret Recipe. Even so, I felt like I could continue to eat more.

..Me and the wonderful dinner :) ..

OMG, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!

2010-07-27T22:53:00.004+08:00

I think it was the best news I've got since the past 4 weeks. I won the Sony TX-5 Camera. If you don't know what I am talking about, read about it here.

It was just yesterday when I went back to the website to see if the results are out and I thought that I wouldn't stand a chance... seeing there were more than 300 entries (I believe).

Just a little more than an hour ago, I found out that the results for the competition. It started out with an email from It is the first time I took part in something which is Nuffnang-related and this helped boost the number of visitors on my blog.

I just want to say thanks for the congratulatory messages, comments etc. :) I'm not that expressive about my thoughts and feelings at the present moment. heh. But, I'm glad and grateful. Finally, Sony's going to meet Canon and join the family.

All together, 3 cameras are going to be given away. The other two people are Hui Ying and theeggyolks.

Work...

2010-07-15T23:34:00.003+08:00

It's going to be 2 weeks since I started working. Today, I felt like slacking a lot. Hence, I did not bother doing any Overtime but when I was about to leave at 5.30pm, a group of students came in to enquire about the forms submitted. Hence, I stayed back for half an hour and helped out. I met my senior's younger brother.

Anyway, while trying to work fast today, I accidentally cut my finger with the metal part of the folder. :(

"We've got a bleeder..."

It sure stings when there's water in contact with the wound. I would not have gone through the second week without Muna to disturb and the dates she brought. :)
Last Monday, Alex and Lois joined and worked part time too. So, it was not so boring. At times, we talk about things which don't make sense or simply random things.

..Lois..

..Muna..

..Me..

..Boxes of FILES..

#36

2010-07-12T08:08:00.002+08:00

I did not realise that I'm blogging even less compared to before exams. The resolutions made always turn out to be a challenge. Well, today's the Registration for the Health Sciences courses in IMU. I will be helping out. It's going to be an exciting day for over 300 students as they embark on their journey.

It means more work for me too. Jene, if you're reading this, I sometimes envy you because when I read your blog, you mention about how free you are.... >.< hehehe...

On Saturday, I finally satisfied my stomach with a good big bowl of fish paste noodles at WinSoon. On Sunday, I went to Bukit Bintang with my mum since I couldn't get the tickets for Twilight: Eclipse. I had Kebab for lunch and a good meal of spicy dry pan mee with soup aside. Although it's not mum's cooking, but these are food which I enjoy. :)

Cheese Cupcakes Which Happened!

2010-07-12T00:15:00.003+08:00

The first time I made cheese cupcakes was last November and I did not like it. I suppose the main reason was because it tasted weird with the sour cream as the topping. This time, I decided to skip the topping and increase the amount of ingredients so that I can fill the cupcake paper more. :) Ooh and I finally got an electrical mixer. So, I had a chance to try it out!
Well, it rose on its own at first but when it cooled down, it "sinked". Hence, the cracks. I made 21! And after the first day, there's only 10 left in the fridge. heh. ^^

It doesn't look attractive in any way unless decorations are made. It's just yellow-er than a lemon cupcake.
So, I took another shot without the cupcake holder. It's not all that pretty but the texture turned out the way I wanted it. Not too crumbly compared to the last time.

..Cut a small piece out..

..Took a bite on the other side..

Am I making you hungry now? :D Anyway. in case you were wondering, I didn't use digestive biscuits as the base. I used Oreo instead. I bought the ready made crushed Oreos. So after mixing it with butter and baking it, it appears black.

What's next? Hopefully, cakes... :)

#35

2010-07-09T00:08:00.003+08:00

It has been one long tiring week. I'm really glad that it's coming to an end soon. Work has been alright. I've been doing filing and making calls. So far, it's manageable. I haven't got the time to paint and draw cartoons these days. Heck, I'm not spending enough time with my family either. I have no time to learn how to cook or even pick up some Mandarin.

Things have been so-so. Even if it's pretty bad, it's still so-so. Recently, there has been some problems with the house in Seremban. One person pulled out, leaving my friend and I in extremely difficult position and unecessary stress as the deposit had been made and the contract had been signed. Yeah, I'm not happy about that. I'm disappointed with things and people. Yet, I can't do anything about it.

"A person can never be really sorry about because when he says nothing and do nothing, it shows already that that person isn't really affected. So why the pretenses? Again, never trust, because... until you're really sure, you can be betrayed at any time, be told the things you want to hear and be given excuses. I was sure and I was wrong. I should have been really absolutely freaking sure. That usually don't happen." This was something I posted up on my facebook.

I believe some of my friends would have understood why I feel betrayed over and over again. Lines like take care, let's hang out some day, we should totally have an outing, how're you?, i'm sorry to say this, chill man etc have become so common that that they're most of the time said to comfort the other person or make the conversation less dry. *sigh* It's just rocky now. The moment will pass and all these would not matter to me any more. It would make me feel stronger, be more mature and realise that sometimes in life, friends would use you to their advantage.

Some things are done out of kindness but its also because of that which makes a person an easy target. But one thing's for sure, once it has happened, it leaves a deep mark. Yeah, it sounds cliche. I'm a pretty easy going person but, when sh*t happens. I just can't be bothered by how immature and spoilt people can be not that I'm not. In fact, at times, I wonder if I'm insecure myself or some people may just tell me that I think too much or just too sensitive. Too emo.

Well, I came to conclude that if I'm an emotional person all the time, it means that I have nothing to hide from my friends. It's true that usually people would prefer a happy human being over the emo one but hey, it's easier to pretend to be happy than to be emo. That's what I think for now.

Friendship is always an issue. Perhaps you've heard it countless times... It is easier to make 10 than to keep 10. I usually go solo most of the time too but depending on the situation, I suppose things change. But the point is, at this age, who would have thought that keeping friendships would be a challenge? It would be when we were in primary school and when we hit high school, it's relationships. Then as we proceed, it's studies to handle... early mid-life crisis?

It's just for the next few years anyway. Because when work starts, I know I won't be looking back to think about this. I'll make new friends by then and find better ones. new and improved. :) If there's anything you picked up from my side of the story, well, I hope it helps you come to realisations or give you reminders or just... something. *ok, no emo post in the coming one. I need to start working on the cartoons ^^*

espresSoup

2010-07-05T23:56:00.004+08:00

I went to Mid Valley 5 times in a week, not because I like it but it has got easy access. I went with my mum on Tuesday to check out what's new because I haven't spend time with her for a long while. Then on Wednesday, I met up with my primary schoolmate, Kar Men who is back in US for now. On Thursday, I spent time with my mum again. On Saturday, I spent time with Pamela and Eng Kian. We watched 9 Temples: Death Ghost. Finally on Sunday, my family met up with my brother and his wife for dinner. So, 5 times!

Anyway, when I was out with Pam and Eng Kian, we were sort of craving for soup and Pam suggested espresSOUP.

I had creamy pumpkin with bread. Yes it was edible, and with my skills, the soup barely spilt on the tray although according to the leaflet, the tray was designed to contain the soup while you cut the bread. I guess I just don't like things to spill. Plus, it's a bit more messy too.

I felt that it was alright but a little sweet because I had a little too much of it. For the other types, it should be fine. They come in sets too. I'd like to give it another try. =)

..Me and my soup..

..Pam and her minestrone soup..

..Eng Kian and his mushroom soup..

I just started working in IMU, at the Students Services Department. I hope things would work out fine and at least, a month and a half there or something? Ohh, it was my first day today and I had work to do that I didn't have time to go on Facebook.

Think Pink...!

2010-07-02T18:14:00.000+08:00

Seriously... Think about it for awhile. What's the first thing that comes to your mind? Girly, babies, curtains, jambu?

Anyway, my friend told me the other day that the house he found in Seremban is pink in colour. During that time, he was looking for housemates and I checked it out with my parents. Before that, he kept on saying that the house is pink and he didn't like it. I thought, hey, why not? Pink is an okay colour. :)

I thought it'd be something like this where the houses on the row were same in colour and there's just one pink house out of nowhere. Well, I was wrong. Turns out... it was the living room and the room I chose which was purplish pink in colour.

Anyway, putting that aside, it's just going to be for 2 years. I just have to survive 2 years and it can pass really fast if I focus on other things. The house is a double-storey terrace which fits only one car in the compound. The housing area is very near to Tesco. In fact, the new Tesco which is being built now is right next to it. We're still looking for another person to join the house since there are 4 rooms and 3 of us.

Right now, I'm thinking about how to make the place more home-y to me. But I reach a point where I feel tired and instead of thinking/planning, I might as well... just accept things which happens or crosses my mind/life. There are other things which I feel are more important at the moment. There are thoughts which needs to be resolved and feelings to be handled wisely (though missing a wisdom tooth and in reaallllyyy painful toothless ache). :(

Turtles Here and There!

2010-07-01T17:14:00.000+08:00

My brother and I went to a turtle sanctuary in Segari. We had nothing to do on a Sunday and we were in still in Sitiawan. So, we decided to go check the place out. It did smell funky. It must have been the water. No entrance fee was required and though it was written on a board that the place is closed from 12.30pm to 2pm, it was still opened to visitors. There were information about sea creatures and fossils I think. But, live turtles were still the main attraction. :)

There were these little guys who are incredibly adorable. Active and making a lot of sounds in the water with the splashing; they are more fun to watch compared to the larger ones.

They get on top of one another. I guess they just don't like being in the water too much.
This lil' fella is just emo. I guess both my brother and I were amazed (? if that's the word) that they can simply rest their flippers on their shells when they don't feel like using it.

We spotted tortoises too. But, they were stoning most of the time. I'm serious....

From the moment I checked out the other turtles till I reached this one, he (or could be a she) did not make a move. It just stayed like that... in that position, on that rock.

It was so still that my brother could take a close-up picture. Okay, I do not know what it was thinking but it sure was thinking deeply.

There were the bigger turtles in a bigger man-made "pond".

Do you see my shadow trying to grab it's flipper? Well, I did give it a shot since I couldn't get close to it. ^^

..A "couple" of turtles. heh. :D ..

..Me and turtles. They were obviously not responsive to my presence. So, I went somewhere else..

..The turtles on the other side of the "pond"..

..Big turtle..

..Grumpy turtle (front) and sleepy turtle (behind)..

I guess that was pretty much it. My brother and I took a walk on the beach which looks pretty much the same at every seaside.
But, I liked the tone in the seawater. Green, light blue, dark blue... It's much nicer in actual sight than in picture.

On the way back, I spotted this! Do you see what I see?

Someone told me that it's a bunny, some told me it's just a fluffy cloud. But, I see a HEART. :)

Dental Visit

2010-06-30T12:35:00.000+08:00

It was not just a dental visit. It was an appointment to extract my wisdom tooth. I had it done in Sitiawan. Now, many would have wondered why I travelled all the way. It's simple. My sis-in-law knows the dentist and it's cheaper compared to the price the KL dentists are charging.

I never quite liked the sound produced by the gadgets especially the high-pitched drilling sound.

..Me before the whole process begin..

Oh, and the picture was also me before I spotted these...

Holy cow! That is one big injection O.O Okay, the needle looks long and the syringe is huge, that's why it looks scary. I had a feeling that it will hurt a lot. Well, the removal of wisdom tooth was a surgical procedure. So, I would have easily guessed that in the syringe was probably one of the local anaesthesia. I just couldn't figure out which one. The list of drugs crossed my mind. Procaine... Chloroprocaine... Lignocaine... Prilocaine... Bupivacaine... Tetracaine... *nerd alert* It was not just one syringe of local anaes but through out the procedure, more were given.

Anyway, this was what happened. The dentist gave me topical anaesthesia. So then, the injection wouldn't be too painful. Well, it worked for me. Only certain parts wasn't numb yet.

Since I was playing (or tasting) it, my tongue got numb. Sensory for left sided maxillary was lost. hehe. My brother and sis-in-law thought I was given laughing gas because it was fun. It's not everyday when you have your senses lost and given back. It helps me appreciate what I feel. Perhaps if I didn't study about these, I would be worried sick because I was feeling numb for more than 5 hours.
The doctor turned out to be very nice. He did struggle with the tooth because it was horizontally impacting the tooth in front. I did feel pain but not at the tooth area. It was at the cheek bone area because of the pressure asserted. For awhile, my jaw got tired and I couldn't close it. Dislocation? Haha. I could also almost see the sweat coming out from the pores as he pulled really hard to get the tooth out. >.< It was scary but at the same time I felt pretty relaxed. The others who saw the procedure (as I was told) were cringing.

It has been 5 days since the extraction and I can basically eat anything. Right after the procedure, I had cendol. So, no food restriction for me. ^^ It wasn't exactly fun because I couldn't taste cake properly =.= On the next day, I realised that the edge of my lips were quite dry and the skin cracked. I didn't know because I was feeling numb then. At the moment, I still can't eat hamburgers because I can't open my mouth wide. My jaw is still recovering. :P

It is also the last day of me + antibiotics. :) Goodbye spiromycin and metronidazole!!! Argh, I hate medicine. (heh, contradicting... I know...)

All in all, I have 3 wisdom teeth left. I'm not wisdomless. It's a minor thing. I only believe that if I lose 2 or more wisdom tooth would it then be a major thing. =)

#35

2010-06-25T19:51:00.001+08:00

I'm going to see the dentist tomorrow. :S I'm going to have 2 of my wisdom teeth taken out. eekz. Well, I'm sure for some, you've gone through the process and for some, you've got no problems with them at all. If only it didn't grow horizontally. >.<

I went to Seremban yesterday too to have a look at the house which I'm going to be staying at for the next 2 years. Well, I'll be writing in a separate post then. I'm leaving for Sitiawan soon... where there's no internet at the place where I'm staying (that's what I was told). I'll only be back on Sunday.

I can't wait to be back! ^^

Video: Taylor Swift Medley

2010-06-25T10:09:00.002+08:00

Ever since Taylor Swift's songs became a hit on the radio, we've heard of the instrumental version of Love Story meets Viva La Vida. There were also many covers of her songs. But, the one which caught my attention was a medley. Previously, I've mentioned a youtuber, Kurt. Well, this next video is also one of his work.

Just for the record, there is only one girl. The video was filmed ("spliced") in a way that there's three of the same person in the video. And, that is what makes this video more interesting.

Once you've checked it out, tell me if it's awesome or what?! I truly admire the idea and creativity which comes with the passion. :)

My Water Moments

2010-06-22T22:07:00.010+08:00

What is the first thing that comes to your mind when I mention 'water moments'? For most of the nuffnangers, it would be the Sony TX5 camera. Putting that aside, I've asked not only myself but my friends too about what they thought about it. Some told me it's the rain; the time you shower; the time you take a leak; perhaps, the moment you got splashed at the usual seaside, swimming pool or waterfall?

I've been giving it so much thought for the past few weeks and I could only truly focus after exams were over and getting my exams results. My thoughts strayed from sweat to tears to looking at the world through a glass of water .

Anyway, I'd love to think that there's something more than what I've mentioned. Writing this has given me the opportunity to get creative, abstract and have fun! (although it could take up quite some time but it I feel it is rewarding in a way - the sense of accomplishment.)

About a month and a half ago, I came back drenched from head to toe as I walked towards the hilltop carpark at my university. It was raining very heavily and although my friend and I shared an umbrella, it did not stop me from looking as if I've jumped into the swimming pool and came out. The rain was my water moment.

Since I can't wait for the rain to come to take a picture, and neither can I really take a picture in a downpour, I decided to make rain myself as inspired by my brother and my friend. HERE IT IS, the picture of MY WATER MOMENTS (or moment)...

I absolutely love it when it rains, but not when my things get wet and I can't do anything about it. And yes, it is my habit of using books as a cover while protecting my notes. Now, a few other reasons why I chose to portray rain is because it helps me get a good sleep. A good sleep for an alert mind the next day... or it could just be a good sleep for sleeping in the next day and skipping morning lectures.

Another reason is because from rain, *as bimbotic as I may sound* that's how pretty rainbows are formed in the sky! :) And my mum used to tell me when I was about 7 years old, that if you cross under a rainbow, it will bring you luck. Ooh, if you're a follower of Korean dramas (well, I am), the most romantic scenes usually happen under the rain. ^^

Now, if I were to have a camera like a Sony TX5 of which I would mention a few amazing features later, perhaps I would finally have a chance to take pictures with me in the water. I'd be able to continue developing the passion for photography no matter what the weather is. I could imagine myself in the middle of the streets or a park... where everyone else is taking cover, I would conveniently take out the Sony TX5 and snap pictures. It is not every day that you get rain at an unexpected time and place. :) Oh, and instead of something like this,

Mum and I (South Africa, 2005)

I could possibly be swimming in the ocean one day! Not with the sharks that is... although it would be pretty exhilarating. But, I would have to get over the fear of going underwater first. ^^ (Swimming in a pool is a different story)

You've seen me mentioning the Sony TX5 camera a few times. What's so special about it? A-ha! Let me tell you (of course with a bit of guide from here.) *click the picture for a larger view*

1. As you may have already guessed, it is water-proof!

It can last up to 1 hour underwater and as deep as 3 metres. I can only last about 20 seconds underwater and I won't go any deeper than 2 metres. heh.

2. It is temperature-proof as it can withstand temperatures to as low as -10 degrees Celcius.
At 8 degrees, I'm already shivering, let alone 0 degrees or -10! Anyway, it would definitely come in handy if I happen to travel overseas and pick up skiing or snowboarding. Actually, even taking pictures of snow can be fun in a way I guess.

3. The Sony TX5 is also dust-proof.

This is just my way of illustrating it. Dust can come in different forms like in the desert or in the attic.

4. I guess this is also an important feature. The camera is shock-proof which means that although you may drop it at a height of 1.5metres which happens to be the average height of us taking a picture, it would still be functioning.
Can you imagine what might happen if a person falls from a height of 1.5metres? Maybe something, maybe nothing. Well, even better if it doesn't happen, right? 2 years ago, my camera "died" because I dropped it from a height less than 1 metre and since then, I've been using my brother's camera.

5. There is also a feature called the Handheld Twilight.

Basically, it sort of means that you wouldn't have to feel stressed when using the camera to capture pictures in places with low/poor lightings. You can still get a clean, sharp picture with reduced "noise" without a tripod. It is also because there is this anti-blur motion mode. How awesome is that? You would not need to worry although your hands shake when taking a picture. Let the camera do the work for you. :)

How does it happen? Well, the camera would capture 6 of the same image in a fraction of a second and then combine it all to form one final picture. Of course, the camera comes with built-in:

• “Exmor R” CMOS Sensor
• BIONZ Image Processor
• 25mm wide angle Carl Zeiss® Vario-Tessar lens

...all to make a better picture.

Moving on, you can take a panaromic picture without effort. No more taking a few pictures and using a software to stitch it up. All you have to do is give it a (slow?) swing vertically or horizontally and the camera automatically stitches the picture for you.

So, from something like this...

Angle 1 + Angle 2

you'd get a natural looking-panaromic picture...

ta-da!

I believe the one more feature which I haven't mentioned of which I do not have illustrations for is that the camera can take up to 10 shots/frames in 1 second if you decide to take a fast moving action such as kicking a ball, diving, swinging a baseball bat etc.

So, the camera comes in 5 different colours of which if you've noticed in my pictures. But, it's okay if you haven't. There's green, black, red, pink and silver.

From left: Red, Green, Silver, Pink, Black

I know you may think that the colours aren't as expected. You've got to see it for yourself. Don't forget to check out the specifications too.

This post was written as an entry for a Nuffnang competition. Wish me luck for this is my first time taking the initiative to participate in one. :)

Trailer: The Human Centipede

2010-06-22T20:34:00.003+08:00

I was supposed to travel to Seremban today to have a look at the house but at about 9am, I received a call from my friend who said that the seniors who are staying at the house has an extra class until 7pm. So, do we proceed as planned and wait until 7pm instead of 5pm or should we reschedule? After a few hours, we finally managed to reschedule it to a Thursday. It is going to be the only day where I'm available until many (about 2) weeks later. =(

I had a nightmare last night where I was part of this movie trailer which I tried to run away from. Now, some of you might be wondering or thinking 'Nah, it shouldn't be you. If anyone's going to be in a movie, it should be me!' That's where you're wrong because trust me, you DO NOT at all want to be part of this one.

It's called The Human Centipede. Introduced by my junior who tagged me in Facebook, I somehow ended up watching it despite the many comments which strongly suggested that I should not at all have loaded it. I did anyway because I was just so darn curious. I gathered the courage and mental strength to keep reminding myself that no matter how bad it is, it's just a movie. It was fine until the last few scenes which made me feel disgusted because it is just inhumane. So, if you do plan to load this video, well, it's at your own risk and whatever happens after that has got nothing to do with me. :P

So, did you load it? Or do you plan to come back in a few days time to this video to watch it just like how I did it? hehe. Freakkyyyy.. I just don't have the guts to watch movies like these. At least, vampires and supernatural is still alright. Well, if you've watched it, it's crazy, right?

Video: "Nothing Left Unsaid"

2010-06-22T15:35:00.001+08:00

"What's your plans for this holidays?" That is one question which I would have the answer copied and pasted on every chatbox if I could but I don't do that. Another common question is "What have you done?" My answer would always remain the same and that is spending time with family. Otherwise, no big plans. In fact, I've scratched all plans I had with my friends due to personal reasons.

I've been hitting the next button during the day and night on Youtube ever since I discovered the videos by this youtuber, Kurt Hugo Schneider who I find very talented and make very good videos. If I could, I would post up every video of his but I'm not going to do that. Only selected ones which I find amusing and amazing will be up here. If you love music, you should definitely check out his vids of him and his friend, Sam Tsui (who by the way is auditioning for Glee! I really hope he gets in because he's really good ^^)

Now, putting that aside... Here's the very first video which I discovered. It is still one of my favourites. Maybe it's the way it was filmed, the quality and the sound effects. Partly, it is also because the acting is just so natural with humour instilled.

I find that the strategy used in the discussion would come in very very handy especially in 'PBL's (Problem-Based Learning). I don't know about you but I feel like I can connect to this video although graduation is still very far away. How far? Say umm... in 2 1/2 years + time? But, there will be a convocation in August.

By the way, Sam Tsui sang the song in the credits. I believe it's an original song but I could be wrong.

#34

2010-06-22T02:24:00.002+08:00

Before exams, I had a list of things which I wanted to do. I had a list of commitments which I wanted to make. Blogging was one of it. To update each and every day, but I didn't. While some of my friends have been blogging and posting multiple posts per day *coughJenecough*, I only had one which I felt had to go up on the blog. The day after my exams ended which was a Friday was by far, the best day I had since my holidays started that is.

Interesting posts coming up soon... So, do come back and check out what I've been up to. :)

Post-exam Day 1

2010-06-12T23:35:00.001+08:00

(I've included some visual aid to help you understand better because I'm sure some would get confused with just words.)

I met up with a friend who has been studying overseas. We went to 1 Utama and had Japanese food. :) I have been craving for some cold soba since Thursday and I finally had some. *content* I think yesterday was one day where I had so many meals.

Because... after lunch, it was New York Cheesecake from Secret Recipe. It always looked plain to me but I've always wondered if there's more to it than just a cheesecake and now I can see, it's not JUST a cheesecake. It's one which is rich in flavour although I feel that the one from Beryl's has more flavour and tastes much better.

Later that evening, we had banana fritters with Vanilla ice cream from Waffle World. I was already full by then.

At home, my mum gave us both a cup of longan drink which well, stuffed me until 3am in the morning when I started feeling hungry again and was craving for some lasagna... =/ With all these cravings, I'm starting to enjoy life more. And no, I'm not pregnant.

Turning Nocturnal?

2010-05-31T04:57:00.003+08:00

I guess it's partly because of the studying that needs to be done which can't be done due to the many distractions. So, there are 9 systems to cover of which 2 of them needs revision since the past Summative which was a total nightmare. Why do I say that it's a nightmare? It's because I could not answer at least half of the whole paper correctly and I know because I went for the feedback session. Yeap, it was that bad for me and it feels like for the first time in my life, that I am failling. I am falling. So, if I don't pick it up somehow, I'm in trouble. Don't you think?

Anyway, how's progress for me? It has been alright I guess, though not so fast and it's worrying definitely. So out of the 7 systems which needs to be done, I've only done 3 which means there are 4 systems to cover and 2 to revise. It sounds like impeding doom. :/ Yeah, an extra week sure would make a lot of difference now that I've gotten a taste of "tough" in exams and I don't like the taste of it.

I borrowed a book from the library and I refer to it every now and then. I realised that many questions from my Summatives came out from there. Perhaps they are common questions which I didn't know how to answer. After all, there isn't much practice that a student can get besides from the question bank of which many wouldn't bother trying because it's just way too difficult to comprehend. Like the many times I've told my friends, I'm just hoping for the best now that I would somehow remember what I've studied or read because understanding isn't a problem. It's remembering what was studied.

Aahh.. just another week to study hard before the pouring of information on the exam papers. Until then, mugging still needs to be done.

#33

2010-05-29T13:37:00.005+08:00

10 things I want to do after my exams:

1. Play the piano for one whole day
2. Listen to music whole day and read novels
3. Clean my room so that I won't need to see the files and books for the next few months
4. Start going for random outings/trips and take pictures of people and with people.
5. Movies? Dramas? Nah... Trips! Trips to Malacca, PWTC, KLPac, Actor's Studio...
6. DANCE --> OMG, how could I put this as no. 6? It should have come in first.
7. Pool, bowling and swimming... Yes, I can float and swim.
8. Lunch and dinner with friends who are flying off before I get my exam results.
9. Window shopping for dresses :)
10. Bake ^^ I want to try cookies this time but I doubt it'll work. >.<

Sleep is not part of the list. I'm already getting enough sleep these days. I'm also up to date with the tv series and dramas. So, I don't think I'm looking forward to anything in that aspect.

About

2010-05-28T13:34:00.000+08:00

Currently in Clinical School, the past 2 1/2 years have been great in Bukit Jalil. The previous About Me.

Dancing and playing the piano are non-web-related hobbies. I like taking pretty pictures. I'm a seasonal emotional cupcake baker. I make jokes which my friends would give me the You're-Lame-Look. I haven't been doing much of art stuff but when I have the inspiration, idea and time, I would most definitely. I am also a series addict:

90210, Covert Affairs, Glee, Grey's Anatomy, House, Make It or Break It, Medium, Pretty Little Liars, Private Practice, Royal Pains, Supernatural, White Collar are series that I follow. I'm sure there's more than the mentioned. I can't remember all the series which I follow.

I'm still talkative and loud but only in front of friends who I'm close too. I LOVE dresses! I'm a cake and biscuit person. I can multitask. I believe most girls can. And, I'm random sometimes without realising it.

Email: yunnpei89[at]gmail.com

"Hello"

2010-05-27T22:16:00.003+08:00

My favourite song in Glee is the cover 'Hello' sang by Lea Michele and Jonathan Groff, originally by Lionel Richie. Thanks to my brother, I've got the songs Here are the lyrics...

I've been alone with you inside my mind
And in my dreams I've kissed your lips a thousand times
I sometimes see you pass outside my door
Hello, is it me you're looking for?

I can see it in your eyes
I can see it in your smile
You're all I've ever wanted
And my arms are open wide
Cause you know just what to say
And you know just what to do
And I want to tell you so much
I love you

oooh yeaah

I long to see the sunlight in your hair
And tell you time and time again how much I care
Sometimes I feel my heart will overflow
Hello, I've just got to let you know
'Cause I wonder where you are
And I wonder what you do
Are you somewhere feeling lonely
Or is someone loving you?
Tell me how to win your heart
For I haven't got a clue
But let me start by saying, I love you

Is it me you're looking for?
'Cause I wonder where you are
And I wonder what you do
(wonder what you do)
Are you somewhere feeling lonely
Or is someone loving you?
Tell me how to win your heart
For I haven't got a clue
But let me start by sayin
I love you

#32

2010-05-26T03:24:00.004+08:00

Aahh great... Now, my sleep cycle is hay-wired. It's not that I don't want to sleep. It's just that I'm not tired yet. I'm strangely awake like how I got up more than 12 hours ago but not that alert. I didn't even nap. =.= I don't even feel like studying. I know some people wake up at this time to study. Got to go to uni at 10.30am tomorrow for OSCE practice. *sigh*

I've been thinking too much. I've been trying to figure things out. Yet, I can't come to a conclusion for everything. At this rate, I think I'm just killing my brain cells even faster. >.< *puffs up cheeks* Sometimes, I wish I've got the answers and response that I want... But, things aren't easy as they seem. Have you wondered how difficult it is to tell someone that you:

wished he/she/they was/were with you
missed him/her/them
want to have lunch with him/her/them
thought about him/her/them
want him/her to call

I have. I did. And these wonders never stop. What triggered the wonders are probably the emo songs. heh. They keep going on and on. I have a feeling that I would have to tell my parents about my blog soon after I move to Seremban since they don't Facebook. =/ I'm still thinking if I should. I'll think about it after my exams. =.=ll *everything is after exams now*

I can't tell the difference.

2010-05-25T18:20:00.002+08:00

I think it's scary when my mum tries new things and let me try them. Just this year, she got a new blender. She has been making fruit juice ever since... and it's awesome until one day...

Yeap, cucumber juice it WAS with sour plum. O.O

Today, mum came into my room with a cup of juice. It's green and yeah, I surely did thought that it'd be cucumber juice the moment I saw it but I knew there were not cucumbers at home. I gave it a try anyway and it turned out to be green apple with sour plum. :)

Haha... I tried putting pineapples in my ribena yesterday and I wondered it if it could substitute a lemon. The result: not really... the pineapples also taste about the same. Maybe, it wasn't long enough. :P

#31

2010-05-25T12:07:00.004+08:00

At the rate that I'm studying, I'm not going to get far... I wonder how I can speed things up. Cutting down the blogging and facebooking time isn't going to save much, really...

I think it's the sleep. If I cut down on my sleep, I'd be able to cover much more but how effective would that be? I don't like getting stuck in dreams. Or dream about the same thing again... even more interesting is continuing a dream from the night before. I feel more tired after dreaming and I can't stop myself from it. >.< Yet, some dreams are just so nice that I wish I can stay a little longer. I wonder sometimes, if I'm the only one dreaming all the time, and worst, remembering them. =.=

"I Never Told You"

2010-05-23T20:03:00.004+08:00

I have been listening to a lot of emo songs since my summatives were over. I managed to get hold of Colbie Caillat's albums, Tegan and Sara, Regina Spektor, Justin Bieber, Owl City, Ximena Sarinana and quite a few songs from Glee! Okay, among all that I've got, I think Colbie's songs from Breakthrough sound pretty good. From Glee, my ultimate favourite is True Colours. I've been listening to that since a few years back and it has been my favourite since. I love it even more now because it was sung by the Glee cast and I believe that their version is nicer. Another song which I can't stop listening to is:

I Never Told You
by Colbie Caillat

I miss those blue eyes
How you kiss me at night
I miss the way we sleep

Like there's no sunrise
Like the taste of your smile
I miss the way we breathe

But I never told you
What I should have said
No, I never told you
I just held it in

And now,
I miss everything about you
Can't believe that I still want you
And after all the things we've been through
I miss everything about you
Without you

I see your blue eyes
Everytime I close mine
You make it hard to see

Where I belong to
When I'm not around you
It's like I'm alone with me

But I never told you
What I should have said
No, I never told you
I just held it in

And now,
I miss everything about you
Can't believe that I still want you
And after all the things we've been through
I miss everything about you
Without you

But I never told you
What I should have said
No, I never told you
I just held it in

And now,
I miss everything about you
Can't believe that I still want you
And after all the things we've been through
I miss everything about you
Without you

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I dreamt about someone leaving me, about parachuting off the university building with a semi-dead guy in the elevator. I dreamt about the flood and how things were so chaotic. I guess that's what my mind is telling me. I'm a mess when it comes to feelings.

#30

2010-05-21T23:52:00.003+08:00

I'm not liking the headache and tiredness. I'm not liking the muscle aches and pain.

With Summatives over and study break starting, this marks the beginning of the race. More or less in 14 days, I have to mug up 9 systems which is about 265 lectures. It sounds scary. It is scary. And, while I feel so tired to go on, I have no choice. I try not to be influenced by my friends who are pretty much doing well with their consistency in studying. I try not to think about the consequences if things turn out to be the other way. I make stupid mistakes and wrong decisions continuously. But with all those said, I think I'm just in denial and not wanting to face the fact that I am indeed afraid, partly worked up and actually do care. My heart says something which my brain denies.

Just a little earlier, I saw the academic calender for the next semester. Yeah, it sure did give me a little bit of pressure. While I am looking forward to new things and all, there are the 'what if's. Enough of taking breaks and chilling for me. I somehow need to find that passion and will... that confidence... to spread my wings to start flying if I want to Ace the paper with something better than borderline passing. ( i know it sounds lame...)

#29

2010-05-18T23:28:00.002+08:00

tired. i. am.

not of studying but from studying. it has been awhile since i worked this hard. sem 4, back then was much more relaxing. exams are just 2 days away and i have 1 1/4 systems to cover. well, some of it would be covered for the first time. i guess i'll just read what i think is important. if it isn't and it comes out, then i guess, i would have to try to use some common sense. but then again, what comes out in exams are 40% from lectures and 60% a guessing game to me. well, new facts would be discovered much later.

i have been procrastinating much more than expected. *sigh* emo. again. yeah, i look calm. i sound calm. i tell some people to be calm. but i'm scared too. i just try brushing off all those studied thoughts of not doing well and the worst case scenario. if i remember, then i do. if i don't, then something better trigger the thought. i feel so "out" these days, in other words, unable to talk properly, write or think properly. imagine spelling 'orange' as 'orrange' or thinking that exophthalmus is the kyphosis of the eyes which is obviously not true. words are stuck in my head.

i'm not stressed. but maybe unconsciously, i am. the best remark i've gotten today was that i am very calm :) although i was unable to build rapport with the patient. that was in my mock exam. bleh. i do not wish that i started earlier in cramming. i still believe that there wouldn't be a lot of difference if i started way earlier although i did read bits and pieces of things. oh well, back to studying. >.<

(everything is in small letters. this means, i'm somewhat emo, tired, sleepy, stressed etc. :P )

#28

2010-05-14T22:08:00.002+08:00

Probably, the last time when I was actually free was last weekend and seems like the week just went pass me. It has been a busy week for me. I've finally started studying seriously just 1 1/2 weeks before the exam. People ask me how is it that I'm so relaxed or how is it that I'm still able to watch Glee, House, Grey's Anatomy, Private Practice, Supernatural, Ghost Whisperer or even movies. I know that some even wondered that with all that going on, how is that I was also able to finish reading a novel and study at the same time. Do I ever feel stressed?

Well, I did. But now, I guess I do but I say I don't because I do not exactly have the same feeling which I used to or maybe I am just in denial. Would I be able to finish studying everything I need to know? I hope so. While I believe I can, there is also the other part which is more inhibited saying that I might not be able to do so. In the end, I'm just going to do what I can.

Hooked to Glee

2010-05-10T00:49:00.002+08:00

I just started watching Glee. I have been wanting to watch them for awhile, but I just didn't know who to get from. In the end, my brother passed 16 episodes to me. :) And although there are a few songs that I don't really like, overall, I am...
mmhmm, strange, how people would say that a picture is worth a thousand words. I feel like mine can make only a sentence. But yeah, it is something new. It is something that I enjoy watching. I know a few of my friends totally love this series and I'm just one of those people who have late interest, at the back of the flow. Still, better late than never as some would phrase it. :)

IMS Presentation

2010-05-07T20:00:00.000+08:00

Well, IMS is finally over and it is a relief. I only realised that in the end, no one was timing us. I spoke faster than usual as I've been practising to keep to the time limit. The 2 minute-Q & A session per subgroup becamse a 5 minute-Q&A session for all 5 groups. So, I did not have to prepare that much. But, extra knowledge is never a waste.

I was not able to focus on what the other people were presenting as I was nervous myself and as it was nearer to my time to present...

... my heart was beating so fast that I could feel the pulsation of my carotid artery without using my fingers.

I was nervous. I didn't know why but I somehow knew that I had to get over it. So, I walked to the other side of the room.

Well, I thought it was fine because it was sort of like a form of interaction for me with the people in the front rows but according to others, it seemed as if I was dancing in front as I presented because I walked funny. >.< Yeah, well, that's IMS for me. If there's anything which I'm going to remember, it's this. Enough about this, it's time to focus on the exams which is in 2 weeks and I'm not even close to finishing the lecture notes which I need to for it. The study of the nervous system makes me nervous for exams. :P

No Matter What Happens

2010-05-06T23:55:00.000+08:00

One semester ago, I saw my seniors getting worked up over IMS. Then, it was my turn. Tomorrow is finally the day. It has been a journey. I've learnt more about me and also about people. I don't know how things are going to be like tomorrow but I do know that I've given my best and if anything happens during the Q&A session which I fear most, so be it. I am leaving everything up to Him. :)

Conquer every challenge though some days may be rainy and not turn out the way you wanted it to be. Even when it is a bright day filled with inspirations, charge forth and conquer your enemy. It can be related to your studies or anything which you find relevant and to me, it's the few more weeks left towards exams. It is the marathon which requires a lot of mental stamina as my friend said.

It means a lot to me especially having friends (andafish ^^) to support and give advice along the way. To you who have been listening to me getting all worked up and complaining about the many random things, yet say nothing, well, thanks (creature). :)

Public speaking is not my thing. I can talk a lot to one person but not to a whole group of people. So wish me luck. hehe. Ooh, and I am not stressed. To my batchmates, all the best tomorrow!

In front of the TV

2010-05-05T12:32:00.005+08:00

Fell asleep on the couch yesterday evening.
When I got up, I turned on the television. Yeap, the news was about to end. It was at 9-ish. Watched the channel for awhile. (my feet are maroon, not brown?)

..15 minutes later..

Situations like this rarely occurs. I am alright with weird supernatural creatures like zombies, vampires etc but not pontianak. >.<

My hair was standing; my heart stopped beating for the 2 seconds. My reflex was too slow to change to the next channel. I ended up covering my eyes and think of happy thoughts such as teddy bears. ^^ I know I sound retarded in a way but maybe next time, I will have a faster reflex.

Cartoons or drawings of small seemingly harmless ghosts are okay with me though but not a human being playing a role. Did I mention the awful screeching laugh? Bleh... I couldn't get a good sleep last night.

I ended up going to uni late again.

CSU Practices These Days

2010-05-04T20:14:00.006+08:00

It's nearly the middle of the week. Time is passing by really fast each day and I think that I'm only feeling so because I don't do much during the day and sleep a lot more. I've been practising clinical skills since a few weeks back. Through out this week, my friends who are simulated patients for me are one their holiday. Hence, I ended up practicing on the pillow and imagining that it's a real person. It is challenging because pillows do not have any limbs! Ooh, and pillows do not talk to me.

Examination of the Cardiovascular System

Note: No, I do not actually say that.

But, ain't it interesting if you can find out how a person's heart just in 5 minutes? :P I'm nice to the pillow. I'm sure the pillow likes me. (not like creature who afflicts pain on the pillow >.<) But, I do enjoy the practice because it can be just soooo hilarious.

My Head Is Just Fine

2010-05-02T04:25:00.007+08:00

Here's how the situation has been for me. I feel stressed out because of the many things I need to remember but I don't seem to be able to do so. The problem is not in understanding. It is in recalling what I've read. I also feel stressed out because of the many things I need to juggle. Time management is important.
Sometimes, I wish I had a USB port so that I could plug in an external hard drive into my head. Sometimes, I wish I ha a bigger head to fit a bigger brain so that I could fit in all the information without losing any.There is a medical condition known as hydrocephalus of which the individual presents with a bigger head but I do not want my head to be filled with water. *sigh*

It is something that many students will experience especially when exams are near. At some point, I'd think that if I fall, I would be able to get up and start all over again or the saying that if you think you can't hang on any longer, just make sure you tie a double knot to the rope that you're hanging on to and never let go.

But if I do have a big head... then I think it's easier to lose balance (unsteady gait) and fall. :P And... it's much tougher to get back into the game since it's more difficult to get up. So, I guess, I'm happy with the one I have now. It just needs a bit of upgrading so that it works faster.

Scientifically speaking, I am not utilizing the whole brain as I study, multitask etc. Humans only use a small percentage of their brain power. So how then can you and I maximize the brain function? I don't know and I'm still trying to figure that out.

As you probably would have guessed, I've been busy and have little time to chill. To those of you who chill a lot, well, carry on then.. but don't catch a cold. :) Lately, I've been told that I'm lame. Well, I'm a late bloomer. hehe. It is after all 5am and I'm nearly done with IMS.

IMS - Just another assessment?

2010-05-01T10:47:00.008+08:00

IMS stands for Intergrated Medical Seminar. Doesn't it sound like something big? IMS is a group work. It could be beneficial if everyone does the work or takes it seriously. It could be a loss if some people starts taking advantage over others. It takes a lot of patience, teamwork and communication. It requires enthusiasm and being an active team player. Most importantly, there shouldn't be a room for slacking because it involves other people's grades too.

I feel misunderstood and brushed aside sometimes for reasons which are not important to them but important to me. I am sometimes obsessed over details. But, I know that it's good because that's what the lecturers are looking for and looking at. Details and professionalism.

Scene 1

Yeah, it definitely stresses me out sometimes. It takes up my time (even blogging does) but I am not complaining about that. Some of my friends know what I'm complaining about already. I feel that the worst part is that despite all these thoughts I have in my head, I can't write it out freely although it is my blog because my friends do read it. Next thing I know, I might just get some text message saying "Why did you have to write about me in your blog?" although no names are mentioned. Well, that is one of the disadvantages of blogging and I guess bloggers would either learn to handle it or avoid stirring up trouble.

So, you're probably wondering what it is all about...

Scene 2

While many people take it lightly because it contributes "just" a small percentage and it would not exactly make a lot of difference, I take a it a little bit more seriously. Since I am not above average in my batch, every percentage matters to me. I suppose it is just who I am. I think one of the responses which I should have included was "Cheh, just 3% only..."

If this was done in Semester 1, there would be more students with higher levels of enthusiasm and also more panic-ky ones. Back then, a short essay of 1% was important. Soon, things change and it's the other way round now. Some of my friends don't really care. Some say that it is too near to exams and it is taking up a lot of their studying time. Some say that it's not worth doing since it carries a lot percentage. But if it carries more percentage, I'm sure there would be a number of complains but at the same time, I suppose, students would be more serious about it.

I suppose for someone like me, it's not just another assessment. It is challenging in many ways that may or may not be assessed.

#27

2010-04-28T22:18:00.002+08:00

It has been a long day today and it also feels like a long week because so many things have been going on for me for the past few days. It was one thing after another and it still is. CSU, PBL, IMS, Hospital visit. On some days, I just have to sacrifice sleeping to finish the workload. On some days, I do not have a chance to study. This week is testing my limits in various ways.

It is amazing how power nap works. 15 minutes of it kept me going for the whole day!

Oral Health Week

2010-04-24T23:00:00.000+08:00

It was Oral Health week again! The last one which I attended was done by my dental friends from DT1/08. Now, the newer batches are doing it. I did not think that I would attend it but I changed my mind since I had to meet up with Lydia anyway.

Plus, when I went to uni early that morning, I saw this! I thought it was kind of cool. The mouth and the uvula hanging from the 'Keluar' sign. This should be taken from the outside. So then, the uvula is behind the teeth but it was a little too dark.

In the center of the atrium they had decorations too. Although it is not much, but it was interesting. Three teeth and the first one has got a different expression. Just like the picture above, it is a good and healthy tooth, well taken care of.

On the other side, it shows a damaged tooth.

Not only were there booths about informations but each of these booths have games for participants to play. Anyone could participate in it as long as they register and get the form from the counter. After completing every booth (of which they would get a chop on the form), they would receive a goody bag. :)

It was not as simple as how it previously was, but neither was it that difficult. I just think that the questions asked were not my field. I do not know oral pathology or anything. The answers I give is either based on common sense or luck. hehe.

Fish for bottle caps! The number of bottle caps you're able to attract with a magnet that is the "bait" would be the number of questions you get to answer. I think you just need to get one right. I managed to get 3... :)

At every booth, there will be a few dental students explaining what that station is all about. Some is about nutrition, pathology, aesthetics etc.

*emo*

Why do I say so? I just like how the light focus on the tooth only. Anyway, among all the booths, I could not win this one. Reason was because I had to throw at least one sweet into any of those holes. I was given 3. Only then, would I be able to answer a question. But since I was not able to do so, I moved on...
I was at the oral pathology station where I listened to oral cancer and congenital malformations of the oral cavity. But, I did not hear about the pathology. Anyway, I went... and played the game. Lucky Lydia was with me. I would not have done it without her. Why do I say so?
The game takes skills and knowledge. I was given a question and I had to throw the darts to hit the right answer. Firstly, I did not know the answer. Secondly, it was challenging cos I have not thrown any darts since IMU Cup and back then, they keep on flying side ways. This time, I was lucky... "Top left," someone whispered. The first dart threw was on the left alright but released a little too late. It ended up on bottom left. Alright, making a few adjustments.... aim higher, release just a little earlier..... and ta-da.. it ACTUALLY hit top left.

Well, even if I did not know the answer, I would still have played based on luck. 3 tries, 7 answers. I would eventually hit something...

Hence, I chose a central incisor. :)

Bowling game

Roll the ball and the pin it hits first would be the question you would have to answer. Each pin has a number attached. During my turn, I had a pink pin in front of me and I was wondering why the pink one had to be there. It was like out of no where. But, I managed to answer that one question anyway. It is even more stressful when there is a time limit like 5 seconds.

The nutrition station which gives out bookmarks! Each colour corresponds to the bookmark you would get at the end of the game. It also corresponds to a specific set of envelope with different pictures in it. I would have gone for the red one but for some reason, I chose orange. haha. I had to tell them which picture belongs to which part of the food pyramid. This one was challenging too. lol.

Arthur~~itis~~ :) He showed me the proper technique of brushing the teeth. :D

Me and Lydia. I wonder if I'd still bump into her after this. :( The dental students in my year are sitting for their finals soon and would be transferring out of the country.

Lastly, me and KJ!

He is my SP (simulated patient) and it is just so rare for me to see him without his camera or take a picture without him holding on to a camera. hehe.